Crybaby // Lil Peep

6.

"YOU CALL DR ADDISON MONTGOMERY AND GET HER HERE NOW" Gus screams at the doctor as he makes a call. He watches as they roll Mac off to surgery, he is covered in her blood. Like she appeared out of thin air Addison comes running around the corner.

"Gus what's happened?!" She run him to checking his him for any cuts.

"How did you get here so quick?! Urm please go Mac go shot she's Urm 10 weeks pregnant please Addison" she doesn't question anything going running off to surgery putting her scrub cap on as she goes. He turns to another doctor "how did Addison get here so quickly?"

The doctor looks around confused before clocking the doctor running off "oh she helping on a quince case. She an amazing doctor" the doctor gets back to work.

"Gus" Jay shouts across the room to him, he turns around in a panic thinking something had happened. Jay grabs his arm "hey man sorry, I know Mac is in surgery but we need your statement" Gus wipes away the blood from his face before nodding.

"Urm we left the restaurant with you guys *he points to Jay and Hank* we said goodbye when there was two shots fired Urm *he looks around really confused, lost without he his other half next to him* I thought they were far away, everyone ran or ducked down but I felt Mac's grip tighten around my arm. I looked down at her she was Urm gripping her stomach *tears fall down his face* we are having a baby you know and she looked really scared. That's when I noticed the blood coming through her fingers. And she kinda lost balance I caught her before she fell down. When I looked up there was a guy standing like 3 doors down holding a gun. He looked surprised he had hit someone. Like 5"9? White, shaved head. He looked like he had scars all his head. Maybe burns? Urm he had like a uniform on" Gus try's his best to remember what just happened. He wipes away the tears, looking down at his hand the tears have mixed with blood he wipes his hand on his jeans.

"A uniform? *Gus looks up at Hank nodding* what kind of uniform?" Hank ask.

"Urm like work trousers. You know like a plumber would wear or a builder I think they were like black or a dark navy. And a sweatshirt but could kinda see a collar. It was again dark but there was a white logo in the corner. Sorry I wasn't close enough to see *he wipes away tears* I'm sorry I wish I saw more" he cries into hands, Hank pats him on the back.

"No Gus you did amazing. We are all here for you" he pats him on the back again before walking off. Jay gets up off the seat Gus grabs his arm before he can walk off.

"Jay please find the guy" he looks at him with anger mixed with sadness in his eyes. He nods at him putting his hand on Gus's shoulder before walking off to do his job. Gus is in his own little world counting down the seconds until he can see Mac again when his thought pattern is broken.

"Gus?" He looks up Nurse Sexton is standing over him "Dr Montgomery sent me to give you an update. Mac is doing well they are doing everything can to repair the damage" she heads back off to surgery.

Gus can't help but wonder if they are never meant to have kids. Maybe they are being punished for their past mistakes, it's only ever going to be just those two. He is ok with it just being the two of them but he doesn't want Mac to be all alone when he goes. He knows he will go before her, that's ok he came to terms with this realisation a long time ago that he'll go before her. He wants her to have someone, a little bit of him to be around her all the time. He wants his Mama to have a little bit of him around, something to remember him by. His past actions are stopping this, he is being punished for the mistakes he's made. He thinks to himself Mac would be better off without this burden in her life but then he remembers how much she loves him. He pulls out her emerald ring that he has worn around his neck every day since that first tour with GBC. The back of the ring is worn down, he rubs it in times of stress , uncertainty or when he feels down. It reminds him that he has a part of her with him at all times, he has a part of her heart, it reminds him of how much she loves him. He catches a glimpse of his love heart tattoo that has MRA in the middle. She is all over his body and he is all over her. In this moment he remembers how much she loves him, how she'll never leave him no matter what. Maybe just their family of two is enough for her as well. His thoughts are broken by a familiar voice.

"Gus" his Mam calls out of his as she comes running over to him.

"Mama" he pulls her in for a cuddle before they sit back down. "Oh god mama I'm so scared"

"Baby it's gonna be ok. She is a fighter. Have they said anything about the baby?" She rubs his shoulders.

"No not yet" tears start to escape his eyes again. He can't stop. His Mom rubs his back as he cries in the waiting room. She pulls out a sandwich and drink for her son. Knowing full well he hasn't eaten since they came in. It's now 3 am.

"Gus this is gonna be ok. You know what Mac always says to me? When we talk about your family?" Gus looks up at her taking the sandwich shaking his head. "She always says to me 'We are meant for babies, regardless how, we will have babies' you two will have a family. You're both young. Babies will come I promise you" she kisses his head.

"Gus?" Nurse Maggie calls for his attention "she's out of surgery now. Dr Montgomery is waiting for you" She smiles at him leading him into a private room. He prepares himself for the worst, expecting to see how she was when she miscarried/ was going through withdrawal. But she looks peaceful, likes she sleeping. He grabs Liza's hand, holding tight like he's a kid again walking into a scary place. This is the scariest place he has even walked into, the unknown.