Conscience Of Love

Chapter 26

Pain

Nakatulala ako sa bintana ng eroplano habang inaalala ang lahat ng nangyari. Beside me was Yaya, she was sleeping silently.

Hinawakan ko ang bracelet na nasa kamay ko 'tsaka mariing pumikit. My eyes hurt because I cried so much. Wala na akong maiyak ngayon. Wala akong ganang kumilos at lalong wala akong ganang magsalita.

Pinahalughog namin ni Harbert ang apartment na tinutuluyan ni Shan. Wala kaming nakita doon bukod sa mga gamit nya. All of his things was there. Halos ata lahat ng damit nya ay nandoon pa.

Harbert was left in Manila because of our business there. Kalahati ng shares ay napunta sa kanya at kalahati ay sa akin. Hindi ko sya masyadong nakakausap dahil palagi syang tulala.

We lost everything. Pasakay palang ng eroplano'y nabasa ko na ang text sa 'kin ni Tito.

Tito:

Wala ka ng babalikan, Addison. Walang awa nilang kinuha lahat.

Muli akong napahilamos sa mukha ko. Now, I need to start from scratch. Pero paano akong magsisimula kung ganito kabigat ang nararamdaman ko?

Nang makarating sa bahay namin sa US ay inubos ko ang oras ko sa pag iyak. Now, I really have nothing but myself. I can't believe this. I can't believe that in just one blink, I've lost her.

Napapikit ako habang inaalala ang kaistriktohan nya sa akin. Back when I was little, she's being a ruthless evil to me when she's mad. Palagi syang nagagalit tuwing binabanggit ko si Daddy.

"But Mom, Lianne has a Dad. She told me that Daddy is important for the family day.."

She just looked at me then returned to what she's doing. Muli syang nagtipa sa telepono at hindi na ako pinansing muli kaya kinalabit ko sya.

I desperately wanted to have a Dad or just to know if I have one. Pitong taong gulang ako noong kailangan sa school na papuntahin namin ang pamilya. But I'm too scared to open up to her that topic cause I know she'll just get mad.

Ang kaibigan kong si Lianne ay palagi akong inaasar. My young mind thinks that it just normal to do that to your friend.

"Mommy, puntahan kaya natin si Daddy?" tanong ko.

She looked at me intently.

"He's far away from here," she just said simply tapos ay ibinalik na ang paningin sa ginagawa.

Tumalikod ako 'tsaka muling tinignan ang papel na hawak ko. It was a drawing of a family picture. Dad, me, and Mom.

Nanginginig ang kamay kong nilagyan ng ekis ang magkahawak naming kamay ni Daddy, tsaka muling humarap kay Mommy.

"Wait for me here! I'll show you something," I said excitedly. The hope just won't go away.

Tumango sya ng hindi tumitingin sa akin.

Kinuha ko ang piggy bank ko sa kwarto at muling pumunta sa kanya. I put the piggy bank on the table then smiled proudly at her.

"What's that hija?" she asked, ang paningin ay nasa piggy bank.

Pinigilan ko ang saya na umuusbong sa akin. The excitement filled my heart. My young and innocent heart was beating loudly. I can't help but to smile widely.

"I saved my money!"

Inilipat nya ang paningin nya sa akin.

"Yes, I can see that you saved money but my question is what's this for?"

She looks so serious and mad now. I'm scared to her every time she's that way kaya nawala ang ngiti sa labi ko.

"F-For a new t-toy, Mommy.."