Fate and Destiny

TWENTY

The following day, Sungjae couldn't focus on their golf game.  Joy's words and Youngjae's mood kept playing in his mind since last night.  His hyung-deul had been exchanging curious looks, fully aware that his head was not in the game.  They decided to end the game early since none of them can really concentrate because they are worried about their maknae.  "Sungjae, is something bothering you?" Minhyuk asked when they were having coffee at the clubhouse.  "You've been distracted since tee off," Ilhoon said.  "Sorry, hyung. I'm just thinking about Sooyoung and Jaejae," Sungjae said.  "Oh? What about them?" Changsub piped in, comically wriggling his eyebrows at their other friends.  "Yesterday, appa and I wanted to buy toys for Jaejae but Sooyoung said no. She said he only gets gifts on special occasions or when he does a good deed. But we just wanted Jaejae to feel how happy we are that he's with us now. Sooyoung said we don't need to give Jaejae gifts all the time. She said it was enough that we spend time with him. Was I wrong, hyung? Does it seem like we're trying to buy Jaejae's affection?" Sungjae turned to Hyunsik.  "No, you're not. But Joy is doing the reward system. A lot of parents do that. It's a way of teaching their kids that they have to be good to receive blessings. And if she's doing that since Youngjae was little, then you, giving him things just because you want to, may cause confusion for him. He may think that if Joy says no, he can just go to you instead," Hyunsik explained.  "Jaejae isn't like that. He's a very responsible kid," Sungjae argued.  "Me, too. I was talking to him in Minhyuk hyung's office while we're waiting for you at the meeting. He's actually mature for his age. But he's still a kid, and he is at a very impressionable age. He asked me not to tell you this but since, technically, our talk isn't covered by doctor-patient confidentiality, and it could help you with Youngjae, I will tell you anyway. He's worried that you won't like him because he thinks he reminds you of his appa and it'll make you sad," Hyunsik added.  "Woah! I didn't know he feels that way. And now, I think he's mad at me," Sungjae said.  "Why'd you think that?" Peniel asked.  "Jaejae's a lively boy. On the few times that I get to eat with them, he's always full of stories, mostly about his day at school. But last night, he was very quiet. Actually, he was quiet even during the drive home. I thought he was just tired since he spent the morning at the amusement park and we went to the mall after lunch. But after finishing his dinner, he just excused himself to get ready for bed. He didn't hug me or give me a goodnight kiss, which he always does. He didn't even say goodnight to me," Sungjae said, almost sounding hysterical.  He was so focused on the issue of Youngjae that he didn't notice his hyung-deul were trying to suppress their laughter at his panicked voice.  "Did you tell him you were going to buy all those toys for him? Maybe he was disappointed when you didn't," Peniel suggested.  "No. Appa was distracting him since we wanted it to be a surprise," Sungjae explained.  "The thing is I think Sooyoung knows but she wouldn't tell me. She said if we're going to share responsibility of raising Jaejae, I have to learn how to read his moods," Sungjae complained.  "Well, she's right. Kids won't tell you outright how they feel, so you have to find out what's going on. You know Hyolyn's niece Yoona sometimes stay with us, right? Hyolyn does that with her. She can tell right away if there's something wrong just by watching Yoona. I think women are better at it than men. All these years and I still find it hard to do each time," Eunkwang said.  "Wow! Raising a kid is a tough job. I wonder how Sooyoung did it for years. But how would I know what's on Jaejae's mind? She said I didn't do anything wrong but that I did do something. But what?" Sungjae was puzzled.  "You said he became quiet during the drive home. But was he his usual self before that?" Minhyuk asked him, his lawyer mind working.  "Yes. He was telling me and Sooyoung about the rides he went on. And then at the toy store, he was happily trying out the toys with me and appa," he told Minhyuk.  "Think. When exactly did he become quiet and if you said anything before that," Minhyuk urged him.  "Well, we were in the car and he was talking about how he can't wait to get home so we can assemble the model plane we bought at the toy store. Then Changsub hyung called. After I hung up, Youngjae asked me if I'm going out today and I said yes. After that he stopped talking," Sungjae recounted.  He suddenly slapped his forehead.  "Aish! I'm so stupid. Of course," he said, suddenly standing up, startling his hyung-deul.  "He said we, not I. He was hoping we'll spend today working on the plane. Sorry, hyung. I have to go," Sungjae said, rushing out.  "Woah! This is the second time he ran out on us either because of Joy or Youngjae," Ilhoon observed.  "It's actually the third time for me," Changsub commented.  "The first one was when he had to pick them up from school the day before the driver reported for work," Changsub explained when they looked at him in confusion.  "Who would have thought that he'll be the first one to become a dad among us," Peniel remarked.  "So you think him suddenly running off will be a regular thing?" Ilhoon asked him.  "No. But I have a feeling there's going to be some changes in our meet-ups. Whatever it is, it's going to give us more personal time," Peniel predicted.  "Which means we'll have more time to date," Hyunsik said, smiling in anticipation.  "So I'm going to be left out again," Ilhoon whined.  "Why don't you try asking Irene out again?" Eunkwang said.  "Hah! Like she'd say yes," Ilhoon sneered.  "So find someone else," Hyunsik advised.  "He can't. He's still hung up on her," Minhyuk declared.  "What the hell happened to you two anyway?" Changsub asked Ilhoon.  "I don't know, hyung. All I know is, after your wedding, she just quit talking to me," Ilhoon replied.  "Then maybe it's high time you talk to her again," Eunkwang advised him.

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Joy has just finished baking the last batch of cookies and was just starting on the brownies when Sungjae walked in.  "Hi! Where's Jaejae?" he asked her.  "Oh! Sungjae-ssi. He's in his room," she replied.  "Is he still mad at me?" he asked her as he sat at the counter.  "I told you, he was never mad at you. But he was kind of hoping you'll build the model with him today," Joy said as she continued putting the ingredients in a bowl.  "I know. Sadly, I'm a little slow and stupid to figure that out," he said, tapping his head.  Joy chuckled as she mixed the batter.  "Nah! You're still new to this. You'll get the hang of it eventually. You just need practice," Joy encouraged him.  "You make it look so easy," Sungjae told her.  "Parenting is never easy. You just get better at it as time passes. It was also hard for me at the beginning. Jaejae was still practically a baby when I took custody of him. I remember getting very frustrated whenever I couldn't figure out what he wanted. But as we grow together, we became in sync with each other's moods. You'll get there, too," Joy said, before scooping some brownie mixture with a teaspoon.  "Here," she said, offering it to Sungjae to taste.  "Mmm! Nice. What are you making?" Sungjae asked.  "Brownies," she said.  "With lots of frosting and mini marshmallows?" he asked eagerly.  "That's how Jaejae likes it," Joy confirmed.  "Oh, goodie. That's how I like it, too," he said, clapping like a child.  "Then I'd better make some more mixture," Joy said, as Sungjae nodded excitedly.  "Eomma," Youngjae called out as he walked into the kitchen.  "Oh, appa," he said, his face lighting up when he saw Sungjae.  "Hi, buddy. Is that the airplane model?" Sungjae asked him, nodding towards the box in his hands.  "Yeah," Youngjae said.  "Want some help?" Sungjae offered, putting an arm around the boy. "Yes," he nodded enthusiastically. "Why don't you two go into the living room? I'll bring you some snacks in a while," Joy said.  As the boy happily ran ahead, Sungjae looked back at Joy who mouthed a silent THANK YOU.  He smiled before following Youngjae to the living room.

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The two Yooks were arranging the pieces of the model on the coffee table when Sungjae spoke.  "Jaejae," he called out to get his attention.  "Were you mad at appa because I went out with my hyung-deul today?" he asked when the boy looked at him.  "No," Youngjae replied.  "But you were disappointed? You wanted us to do this together?" Sungjae prompted.  "A little. I thought it would be more fun," Youngjae said honestly.  "You know, you can always tell me if there's something you want. If I can, I'll give it to you," he told him.  "I just want to spend some time with you, like what my friends do with their appa. But it's okay if you can't. Eomma said you're running a big company and you're busy because people in the office depends on you," Youngjae said.  "I may be busy, but I will always make time for you. Especially if you need me. You're my priority now, more than anything," Sungjae said.  "From now on, I won't go out on Sundays anymore," Sungjae promised.  "But you still need to meet with the samchon-deul. They're your friends, and you should also play with them," Youngjae argued.  "We can always play golf on other days," Sungjae said but Youngjae looked skeptical.  "Okay. How about if I ask them to play on Saturdays so I can be free on Sundays?" he asked Youngjae.  "But you have work on Saturdays," Youngjae reminded him.  "Not really. I just go to the office because I have nothing to do here at home," he explained to Youngjae.  "Okay. Appa, can you also come home early every day? It would be nice to eat dinner together," Youngjae said shyly.  "I can do that. Except on Fridays when I have to meet with my hyung-deul. But I won't stay out so late like before. I can't keep your eomma waiting up for me every night. She needs her beauty sleep," Sungjae joked.  Youngjae giggled.  "Is that okay with you?" he asked Youngjae.  He was surprised when Youngjae suddenly hugged him tight.  "Yes. Thank you. I love you, appa!" Youngjae said. Sungjae thought his heart would burst when he heard those words.  "I love you too, buddy," he said, hugging Youngjae just as tight, his eyes moist.  Joy, who heard their whole conversation, went back to the kitchen.  She was wiping her tears, but a big smile was on her face.