Growth - Satori Tendou x Reader

(28): we should talk

Morning rolled by slowly. Tendou had been passed out for the majority of it. Leaving you to anxiously roam the house due to not knowing when his mother would be home. You highly doubt she'd care if she found you making breakfast in her kitchen but you didn't want to seem rude or over-comfortable in her space. 

Nevertheless, one of the first things you did once you slunk out from under Tendou's arm was quietly slip downstairs to make some tea for yourself. It was very cold being away from Tendou's warm touch. The man seemed to just radiate heat like a space heater. 

While your tea steeped you went to the small closet by the front door where Tendou had stored your things in the past to search for something warm. Finding a very oversized patch pattern sweater. It was the same one Tendou often wore when going out. It goes good in any occasion, which is what made it his favorite. Also it helped that his favorite fit photos on instagram he often wore it. 

Everyone has that one sweater they basically live in. 

So, by the time you made it upstairs you were all warm. Tea in your hand, sweater consuming your body and anxiety to shake you to your core. 

Your mind ponders the serious talk Tendou wanted to have. 

What could there be that he hasn't told you? 

What was the talk about?

Was there more the evil ex did?

God, you hopped that wasn't the case. 

But it had to be about the game...right? 

Hopefully not about the small orange child. 

It took awhile for Tendou to wake up but once he did he was slugging down your tea. Teasing that you made it perfect just for him when in reality you just needed warmth! 

"Did you tap into my mind? Knowing I was dreaming of swimming in an ocean of earl grey waves!~" Tendou hums sleepily, trying his hardest to chirp up just for you. In reality he was having nightmares that shook him deeply. He wanted nothing but to forget them completely. 

It resonated with you, unknown to Tendou, that he wasn't dreaming of vast oceans to swim in. You knew this due to the quiet mutters that fell from his lips throughout the night. Something was bothering him. 

But you put on a smile, ruffling his hair and kiss his forehead. 

"If you drink that all I'm never going to forgive you, I need caffeine." 

Tendou only mimics your words in a high pitch tone as you scrunch your face in annoyance. Snatching your tea from his hands, tongue already out as if saying 'whatever.'

It's quiet for a few seconds more. It's as if the tension is growing as Tendou glances around the room in a tired haze. Eyeing his surroundings like he often eyes the hallways of school. As if he's not actually looking at anything, just glancing around to seem like he's doing something. When in reality there's nothing peaking his interest at all. 

Tendou realizes he has this habit due to Ushijima pointing it out whenever he's not doing it. Ushijima has noticed most things don't catch Tendou's attention, knowing it's because of the bullying when he was younger. Normal people never intrigue Tendou. Therefore school gives him no interest. Especially those in the hallway. 

You picked up on this pretty fast too. 

Due to being someone his eyes actually caught. 

"So...you wanted to talk?" 

Tendou's eyes snap to you. Its the same emotionless glance he often gives others, but per-usual when met with someone he cares for they change. This time filling with deep confusion and hurt. It's as if the tension and anxiety the two of you both have been holding in all releases at once. Flowing and clashing together just with one glance. 

"Yeah..." Tendou tilts his head. His questioning eyes dancing around your features. Trying to read your thoughts and emotions. Just knowing its been eating you up to know, "I wanted to um, first of all, say that I completely love you. I'm completely and utterly in love with you. I want nothing but to cherish every second with you..." 

You only nod. Something told you he wasn't done.

"...and I wanted to talk about this with you because of how much I love you. I care about you deeply, deeper than I think anyone ever before just because of how much you've helped me," Tendou brings his hands to hold your face. Rubbing your cheeks with his thumbs as he plants a kiss to the center of your forehead, "That's also why I need to ask you to be patient with me...I feel like I'm going down a spiral of emptiness. Completely lost in the world I have built for myself. I never had anything until volleyball. The game helped me a lot. Make friends. Grow. Find purpose in the world and environment that has been so mean to me...you know school has never been the safest place for me." 

Again, you only nod. It was no news to you the bullying he's gone through. The two of you didn't go to the same school until high school but the peers that happened to know him throughout his whole life were nothing but harsh to him. Dragging him through the mud as if they're conditioned to. Just because they are, it's the only way they've ever interacted with Tendou. Making fun of his looks, his personality, his lifestyle and now they all know his team lost. It was something anyone would have a difficult time with. Being bullied their whole life. Watched by those who are mean to him. Them seeing him finally good at something, possibly gaining respect, and then watching him lose. 

The quietness that the room sunk into due to Tendou's sudden silence made you snap out of your listening state. Placing your hands on top of his, grasping them so lovingly from your face just to grab his attention. Reassure him you mean no harm. 

"I don't care about others. I care about you. And I'm not worried about us, I'm worried about you. I'll drag anyone who tries to hurt you. No one will fuck with you with me around! And, I'm sure you know I love you too. So deeply. You have my heart."