𝐹𝑖𝑟𝑒 𝑎𝑛𝑑 𝐼𝑐𝑒 [𝑇𝑜𝑑𝑜𝐷𝑒𝑘𝑢/𝐷𝑒𝑘𝑢𝑇𝑜𝑑𝑜]

Chapter 34 - Masterpiece

Now suddenly you're asking for it back
Could you tell me, where'd you get the nerve?
Yeah, you could say you miss all that we had
But I don't really care how bad it hurts
When you broke me first.

(You broke me first - Tate McRae)

~●~

Chapter 34 - Masterpiece

DAY 405

I sat in silence on the entrance stairs with my phone in my hands.
I've been staring at the text I received from Fuyumi for a long time in a pointless attempt to figure out what catastrophe was going to take place the next day.

'I'm picking you up tomorrow evening ok? We're having a family dinner, Natsuo is coming home for the weekend.' - Fuyumi wrote.

I didn't really know how I was supposed to feel about going back home. It had been a while since the last time I was there and, since being back to UA wasn't how I thought it would be, for the first time ever, I couldn't tell which place I hated the most. UA didn't feel like a nice escape from home anymore and that was mainly because Midoriya was there. It was hard to ignore him and even if Miyako, Momo and Jirō were around I couldn't help but feeling lonely around everyone else. I knew that the girls were trying to keep me company as much as they could but they had their own lives to deal with and as I waited in a corner for them to come back, I still felt like I was continuously missing something in my life, but I couldn't tell what it was.
Anyway, my mind kept thinking about the last time I had to leave the school ground for a family dinner, and since that time I ended up being forced to date Miyako, my anxiety kept growing little by little: I could only imagine what I could have ended up being forced to do this time.
Best case scenario: they were going to put me in a mental hospital like my mother.
That actually didn't sound so bad, if anything I was not going to have to interact with people.

"Shōto..." - Midoriya's voice startled me from the door. I glanced his way briefly even though I knew that it was something I shouldn't have done for my own sake. He took a couple steps forward with a half-smile and that was just enough for my heart to squirm in pain.

"Are you alright?" - he asked kneeling next to me as my glance fell back to my phone.

I didn't answer, mainly because I didn't trust myself with talking.
To be honest, I didn't know how to talk with him anymore: I got so used to ignore him at that point, that having any kind of conversation with him was just really awkward.
We didn't share a word ever since that day in the locker room.
To be fair, he had tried to talk to me a few times but I just walked away ignoring him. It was a habit at that point, but even though I grew used to it, that didn't mean that it had become any easier or any less painful for me. No matter how hard I tried to forget and leave him in my past, I kept craving and loving him.

I could see with the corner of my eye that he was glancing at my bandaged wrist, and I instinctively tried to pull down the sleeve of my shirt a bit more in shame. My so-called friends had been busy these last few days, so I ended up having a lot of alone time and a few chances for the familiar bad thoughts to run free.
Those were just few light cuts anyway, nothing major, but still I managed to hurt myself again. If Yūki knew about it, I'd have to face a never-ending lecture.

"Should I call Momo or Miyako?" - he asked quietly to the point that I couldn't tell if it was asking that to me or if he was talking to himself.

"Leave me alone..." - I said glancing at him. He seemed taken aback and stood still for a few seconds with his mouth slightly open as if he was willing to say something, before closing it swallowing hard.