Thirty Two

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I'm so sorry it's taken so long for an update 🥺

Demi

"Did you have a good birthday?"

"I had the best birthday, Baby, thank you for my surprise" I giggled as I rolled myself on top of him and straddled his lap. Odell didn't want us getting intimate in his mom's house, so we left and are staying in a hotel nearby. We've already spent the majority of the night rolling around in the sheets. "Are you okay, Baby?" my eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Odell was staring into my eyes with so much intensity.

"What do you mean?"

"You're missing this glow in your eyes. It used to be there but it isn't anymore. Did something happen in New York?" I sighed as I rolled off him. He rolled to face me and stroked a strand of hair out of my face. "You okay, Gorgeous?"

"I had a miscarriage last year" I stared up at the ceiling. "It was when Paisley was kidnapped. I don't know whether you know about that?" he gave me a tiny smile.

"I know about it, Baby" I nodded and swallowed.

"I knew that I was pregnant, but I couldn't find the strength to actually care. All I could think about was Paisley and getting her back" I felt myself becoming emotional. "I never properly mourned the baby. I didn't even really think about them until recently when Jimmy asked about them because of one song on my album" Odell didn't interrupt, he just listened. "My ex and I broke up after it, he blamed me and I don't really blame him because it was my fault. I wasn't looking after myself properly. I-I wasn't doing everything I should have. I wasn't being a good mom" I covered my face with my hands as I choked on a sob. Odell wrapped his arm around me and nuzzled his face into my neck which he delicately pressed a kiss too.

"Don't blame yourself, Baby. He was wrong to blame you. You were scared for the baby who had been taken from you. You were worried about Paisley, Demi" he pulled his face from my neck as I sniffled and wiped my cheeks. "It wasn't your fault."

"But I should have been able to protect them."

"Baby, it doesn't work like that" he gently wiped my cheeks. "How about we do something special in memory of them when we get back home?" my eyebrows furrowed together but my heart warmed at the way he said 'we.'

"Like what?"

"I don't know yet, but we'll think of something."

"You would really do that, even though they weren't your baby?" he nodded and his light smile comforted me.

"Of course, Demi" I turned myself into him and began to trace patterns on his jaw as he locked his arm around my waist.

"Would you have blamed me? If it was now and the baby was ours, would you have blamed me for losing them?"

"No, Demi. I love you; I wouldn't blame you for something that you can't control."

"But I could have controlled it. I should have been looking after myself and..." Odell shut me up by pressing his index finger against my lips.

"Nobody can say that you wouldn't have lost the baby anyway" I fell silent and Odell just continued to watch me. "Would you like more babies?" my lips twitched slightly at the corners and I glanced to meet Odell's gaze.

"I would" his lips twitched into a smile. "What about you? Would you like babies?"

"I'd like 1 or two in the future" the smile on my face widened. "Maybe we could get back to practicing until we're ready to make one" I giggled as he lightly pushed his hand between my legs and then rolled to hover over me. I moaned out as we connected as one, the odd tear rolling down my cheek, but they weren't tears of sadness or heartbreak, they were tears of contentment and complete joy.

-

I grumbled awake at the sound of my phone ringtone. I removed my arm from the confines of the sheet that was wrapped around my body as well as Odell's limbs. He grumbled down my ear at the movement causing me to lightly giggle. I reached out for my phone which I pulled off charge. I winced at the brightness of my screen but the annoyance I felt at being woken so early completely vanished at the caller ID.

"Matthew? Are you okay?"

"Demi, I'm so sorry to call you this early" I could only just hear what he was saying over the cries in the background.

"Is that Paisley crying?"

"She's had a nightmare and she won't settle until she's spoken to you. I've never seen her so hysterical. Usually I can get her to calm down but she just wants you" my heart physically ached.

"Put her on the phone" I glanced to Odell who stirred, his eyes watching me with a slight hint of worry.

"Mama."

"Hi Princess. Did you have a bad dream?"

"You need to talk, Pais, mommy can't see you" I let out a light laugh. The giggle that travelled through the phone helped slightly to settle my worry.

"Miss you. When you come home?"

"I'll be home so soon, Baby, I promise and I miss you too" Odell pressed a gentle kiss to my cheek. "What was your dream about, Paisley?" she sniffled down the line.

"You had booboo and you no cuddle" my heart melted.

"I promise that I have no booboo and we can cuddle all the time when I get home" I could just imagine her smile and the image made me miss her tremendously. "Try and get back to sleep, Pais, okay? Daddy will protect you before I get home."

"Daddy slay the dragon" I lightly laughed as a memory popped into my head. It was a couple months ago when I put Paisley to bed with Matthew. She wanted him to slay the dragon and watching that scene play out was entertaining in itself, but I loved him even more for what he would do to make our daughter happy.

"You can sleep peacefully now then, Princess. I love you so much, Paisley."

"Love you, Mama."

"Night, Honey" there was movement on the other end of the line for a moment before Matthew spoke.

"I'm so sorry again, Demi."

"Don't stress, it's fine. Go and get her into bed."

"I'm going too. Love you, Dems."

"Love you too. Night" I plugged my phone back on charge and then rolled over in bed to cuddle into Odell. He wrapped his arm around me and pressed a kiss to my forehead. It didn't take long for me to drop back off to sleep.

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