He's in the Rain

chapter fourteen

"um, okay? am i supposed to be fluttered or something?" yeonjun asked soobin as they were still walking along the shore. soobin just chuckled and shook his head. he continued to look at the sky above the sea, seeing how the sun takes over almost everything.

yeonjun, on the other hand, was looking at the sky as well but kept on being distracted by soobin. his eyes always catches a glimpse of soobin, like he was wondering. 'why do i feel like you're hiding something? i feel like you're locked away from everything.'

"yeonjunie," soobin spoke after a two-minute long silence. he was still not looking at yeonjun and only at the sky. yeonjun wasn't looking at soobin too but was looking down at his feet in the sand. "are you happy?"

yeonjun wondered why soobin asked that question. is he happy? "yeah. i have my family and friends so why shouldn't i be?"

soobin was now looking at yeonjun. he smiled weakly and intertwined both his hands like he was trying to make himself calm. yeonjun looked at him and noticed his friend's eyes. the eyes that were obviously about to tear up. soobin immediately wiped off the tears forming in his eyes with his hands and took a deep breath.

he looked at yeonjun and said, "let's stay there for a while." soobin pointed at the huge rocks that were in between the shore and the sea. the waves aren't that strong so it wouldn't be a bother to sit there while worrying about their clothes.

and so they went there, just the two of them. soobin and yeonjun were a bit far from each other for they were sitting on different rocks. yeonjun was sitting on a higher rock. beomgyu, huening kai, and taehyun were already on the water, splashing everywhere. they were playing around and here are the other two, calm and quiet. the two could hear the other three although they were far away. huening kai's voice was the most audible.

silence. it was only silence that was surrounding the two of them now that the three younger men moved to another spot here in the beach. the sea hitting the shore with its waves for sure can be heard but overall, only silence takes place. they let the breeze hit their faces as they were enjoying its chilly temperature. they look at the sky and it's getting a bit dark, signaling about the upcoming rain. but they didn't care. they sat down, ready to explore about each other.

"you know, sometimes, i just want to relive my life differently," soobin started the conversation. yeonjun was thinking of what to answer, but soobin made his statement not understandable. "just like how you live your life, just like how everyone else lives their lives."

yeonjun didn't know how to respond. is a simple 'okay' enough? of course not. soobin's words mean a lot, basically saying that he thinks his life is a mess that he wanted to clean. he wants to restart everything, starting from the day his life started. but how? when there's no such thing that could turn back time. they couldn't go back to the past. they have no choice but to live the present and seek for a nice future. that's all they could do.

"why? you're life may not be perfect, but it's beautiful. life is beautiful, soobin," said yeonjun.

the thing is, yeonjun isn't that type to give such words with meanings that give huge impacts. however, he tries his best to at least keep up with soobin's statements. he never felt like what soobin was feeling right now. he never had these problems before so he has no idea how he could converse with the younger.

"i used to think that way, but i don't know what suddenly happened," soobin responded. "after seeing you, beomgyu, taehyun, and huening kai, my perspective in life changed. don't get me wrong. i didn't say meeting you was a bad thing. it's just that... i envy all of you." yeonjun became confused.