He's in the Rain

us : an alternative ending

"No but I saw your face! Jealousy screamed all over it." Loud laughter was heard throughout the backyard of Soobin's house as they were in the pool, enjoying the night. A smile made its way to the younger's lips as he remembered moments shared between him and the older.

"Shut up." Yeonjun tried to have a poker face but the smile on his lover's face was everything. He couldn't help it and gave in, smiling in the process. He thanked everything, especially Him, that he was able to see that smile up close again.

Speaking of...

"Remember when we used to date?" Silence.

Silence took over the place and surrounded the two of them. No one between both of them could look at each other, embarrassed and afraid. Everything was already settled but no matter how many times they try to forget, it will always be fresh inside their minds. Even if years may pass and they age so much, it will always, and will be, remembered. Even when they said they will let new memories cover that up, it will be unspoken but will remain.

"We're still dating, though," Soobin spoke up after a deafening silence. When Yeonjun heard the younger's breath hitching and him stuttering in his words, right there and then he realized that he shouldn't have asked that.

"Yeah. Right," the older gulped, nodding. "We were so immature back then, not even letting each other explain."

Soobin couldn't answer because his lover was right. Yeonjun was so right at that. Immaturity was taking over their relationship in the past too much that it ruined the relationship. It ruined them both.

Yeonjun was in pain, and Soobin understood. Well, at first.

Soobin couldn't seem to have the communication Yeonjun wanted and well, he also understood. At first, of course.

They were both so eager to communicate that they forgot that patience matters as much as communication does. Yeonjun was facing family problems as his grandmother joined the creator. Soobin, on the other hand, was healing, refrained from things that would wreck him. Both of them, during their dark times, needed each other but lost their own selves. So when they had the chance to talk, nobody could handle the relationship on their back.

At that time, they made their initial reaction as the best decision. And that is... to part ways.

"I thought we'd end there, to be honest," Yeonjun bitterly smiled at the younger, meeting him in the eye. Soobin's right hand slowly made its way to Yeonjun's hand placed on the side of the pool, placing his own above the older's and intertwining with it. The warmth was felt through their arms. Soobin rubbed his thumb on Yeonjun's hand.

"I never imagined leaving you like that. I won't." Soobin moved closer, hugging the love of his life from the back. They were still holding hands as they hugged, feeling more warmth. "Not a promise, but I will."

Then, Yeonjun remembered his lover's first and last promise. During the second time when he thought everything between the two of them would end, the time where he thought Soobin breathed his last breath, Soobin made a promise. He always remembered that. It was a broken promise that actually isn't. Because when he promised to open his eyes after closing, it did open. For a while it didn't, but when the older's tears dried out, it did. It was shocking, surprising, unbelievable, and at the same time heart-warming. It made Yeonjun's heart jump for joy.

Soobin hummed in response. Yeonjun felt the vibration of Soobin's voice through his back, sending shivers. This man still makes him so weak for him.

"We will, love." Love. Irreplaceable. "We will stay together for more and more years to come. Remember that."

For a few minutes, the two remained silent. They were both in a comfortable sitting state on the stairs of the pool. Yeonjun was thinking of what to respond to Soobin's words despite it being said a while back, while the younger was busy staring at him. He could never get tired seeing that face even if time comes that it's wrinkled and aged.

Meanwhile, Yeonjun was contemplating to ask something to his lover. Do you love me? That's the question. It was obvious, but he wanted to hear it. He didn't want just the assurance with the younger calling him 'Love' or just his hugs and kisses. No, he wants to hear it despite him feeling it. However, he didn't want to ask it too, thinking that Soobin might say he doubts his love for him. He doesn't want that. But you know...

He still did. "You love me, right?"

Soobin's eyebrows met in the middle, confusion taking over. Yeonjun looked down, afraid again. He thinks that he kept on making stupid decisions. He thinks it is so much better to just keep his mouth shut. But could Soobin blame him for Yeonjun having his mind full? Of course, not. After almost a year of being apart, of course someone would doubt. It has been a long time and no one would know if the love shared between them vanished into thin air. No one would know if someone already gave up, someone's still trying, or both of them doing the same thing. No one. They thirst for assurance.

"I love you," Soobin stared at his eyes, not looking on anything else but him and his eyes. "I love you, I love you. I love you so much. If that isn't enough, then I love you. I love you more than you think, more than you know. I love you more than love itself. Three words, Yeonjun. I love you."

While Soobin was telling the older how much he loves him, Yeonjun was near to crying. Because once again, they're sharing something called love between them. Once again, they started anew. And once again, there was something called 'us'.

"See that star?" Soobin pointed at a particular star far above them both. Yeonjun nodded, looking at that celestial body. "Even if that star passes us by, I'll still love you."

A tear fell. Yeonjun couldn't help it.

"Imagine the blue sea we always go to," Soobin said. "Even if that sea goes too deep for us to enjoy it, I'll still love you."

"Then, imagine the mountain we hiked to the top before. No matter how huge or small it may get, I'll still love you. The life that I almost lost, yeah? No matter how fleeting it may get, I'll still have this love for you. And the story called 'us'? No matter how short-lived our story is, my love will remain. You never know, love. Maybe there's still another chapter left for us to feel our ephemeral love."

I just hope all of those are true to reality, Yeonjun said in his mind. He could never, ever, let go anymore to this man. Three conflicts and obstacles they faced that almost and did ruin them, but even when the world wasn't on their sides, they still happened to meet.

When everything unexpected comes to life without warning. Where everyone was waiting for love to come their way. When love comes and fades as if they were ready. When love returns and their story continues in another chapter, reminiscing memories and creating more. When everything seems wrong and his love comes by.

And they were in the rain.