A New Era

IX

Tw: suicidal thoughts, self harm, panic attacks

[Grian]

     Mao had sent me back to Hermitcraft for a day. I had resisted, but he had said that it was the best opinion right now. I was really tired after everything and we couldn't do anything about Sam since we didn't have enough information.

I took a paper from my chest and wrote a quick letter to Mumbo sending it through the messaging system I had built between our hobbit holes a few weeks ago.

I kept looking around. I was so paranoid now when I knew that Sam was free. I knew he was after me.

I fell down on my bed and stared at the ceiling. The losses of Irwin, Sherenidy and Leslie had all been Sam's doings, meaning that they had been my faults. I had caused the death of my three siblings just because I hadn't agreed to love someone.

What if I had originally agreed to become his? What if I had originally decided to date him and ignore the fact that he was going mad? What if I hadn't ever left him? Would that have stopped this from happening?

Tears were forming in my eyes and made their way down my cheeks. I just wanted everyone around me to be happy. I didn't want to see my siblings die.

If I died, would that stop Sam from hurting everyone?

A voice inside my head. It's all that was, but I liked it. It sounded right.

I let out a laugh. I slowly felt like I was going mad. The voice in my head grew stronger and stronger.

"They wouldn't care if you died," Xavier's ice-cold voice rang through our head.

"They wouldn't!" My voice was hysterical and cold. I was going mad and Xavier just fueled the fire with his words.

"You can set us free. All it takes is one stab with a sword or a rope around the neck," Xavier encouraged.

I stood up and walked to my storage space. I slowly picked up my enchanted diamond sword and glanced at it.

It hurts only a little.

The voice rang through my head.

I wanted to test the sword before taking my life with it. I placed it against my wrist and let it cut through the skin.

I raised my wrist to look at the bleeding cut and smiled. I wanted more, more blood, more of my own blood.

Another cut, and another, one more, maybe still a bit more, another, no enough, another.

I finished and looked at my wrist. It was bleeding badly and the pain felt nice.

"Are you going to be joining me my little angel?" I froze when I heard the voice.

I slowly turned around to see a young woman faintly standing a few meters away from me. I recognized her, I knew exactly who she was.

Her face was full of hope, but also sadness. Her eyes were glowing slightly and she was looking directly at me. She was holding a Lily of The Valley in her hands.

Tears began to fell on my cheeks again as I looked at her. It had been so long since I had last heard her voice.

"My little angel, c'mere. It's alright! I can make it painless if you c'mere to me," She smiled softly and offered her empty hand towards me.

"Mom...?" I whispered quietly and took a small step towards her.

"Come my little angel," She sang quietly.