Arcane

chapter 31

"Let me make you feel good"

"What?" My heart started to speed up more if that was possible, the thought of having to fake another orgasm with a guy did not seem fun. It's not their fault, I'm just not someone who can have orgasms unless I do it. "Let me make you feel good" he whispered, sucking on my neck, feeling like fire on my skin.

He sensed my hesitation and stopped, pulling back looking me in the eyes, the mood changing slightly. "You don't have to Ember, you know that right? We can stop, just say the word"

My heart clenched a bit, none of my ex's really cared if I wanted to stop or not, getting mad when I pushed them off so I eventually gave in.

"It's- it's not that I don't want to Harry" I said, looking up at the ceiling, was I really about to tell him about this? It's not that I think he'll judge me for it but... there's always a small chance he will.

Also, this is super embarrassing.

"What is it then?" he asked, his tone sounded genuinely curious. "Well it's just that I've never- erm" He pulled back a bit more, his eyebrows raised a bit.

"You're a virgin?"

I let out a short cackle, slapping my hand over my mouth, Harry's eyes growing wide before he laughed as well. "What?" He asked, smiling and sitting up as I leaned against the head board.

"No trust me I'm not a virgin," I started, running my hand through my hair as I caught my breath. "I've never- how do I say this. I mean I've head sex and all that, but never... um finished?" I cringed at my wording, not being able to find the right wording.

Harry let out a small chuckle, then looking at me with a shocked look on his face when he saw I was serious. "Wait- you're not joking?" I pressed my lips into a line and shook my head, my cheeks probably super red by now.

"You've never had an orgasm?" It was a question but he said it like a fact, surprised by the words coming out of his mouth. I shook my head again and looked down, wanting to get swallowed up by the ground. "Not even from yourself?"

"No, just from other people. I think I'm just defective" I said, looking up at Harry for a second before looking back down. He made me look at him with his hands, seeming a bit more serious.

"You're not defective Ember, the other people just didn't know what they were doing" I shrugged, I wasn't really affected anymore. I went to the Gynecologist a few times and she said it was normal, so I didn't really think about it.

"Here, can I try something?" Harry asked, shuffling a bit. I nodded, I trusted Harry. He would stop if I told him to, plus this isn't sex. I'm not ready for that just yet.

"Okay, lie down on your side" I did as he told and felt him press behind me, my back to his chest. "Can I take these off?" He asked, pulling at my pants. I nodded but he shook his head behind me "I need words, Ember. Use your words"

I felt my fingers start to tingle, the room getting hot as I squeaked out a measly "yes", Harry undoing the button and pulling my pants off, throwing them across the room. I felt a little exposed and he seemed to notice, pulling the covers over my legs.

He pressed a tender kiss on my shoulder, electricity following his trail. He nudged his nose against my neck, and I moved it, granting him more access as he placed small kissed there once in a while.