(October 4, 2020)
imagine theres no heaven its easy if you try
damon was sitting in their room. straight- oops i mean gay vibing. watching supernatural. because of course. its supernatural brainrot time holy fuck. why are you so obsessed with-
ben jumped out of the closet. "DAMON YOU NEED TO CHECK INSTAGRAM RIGHT NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!"
"WHY!?!??!" they sprang up out of bed.
"because i made. an edit of us. 👉👈"
damon nodded and opened the app on they kindle fire hd 2015. it was a good edit. MMMMMMM HOO BABY GOOD EDIT. but when they looked back up, ben disappeared? they could hear noises in the kitchen. and ben was barking. their brother screamed. ben really do be establishing dominance while he makes a sandwich doe.
they looked back down and saw that some people they care about had updated their story. they sat back down and went through everything. thats when it happened. the screen transitioned to the next person. billie joe armstrong. of course it was a screenshot of his notes app. and it just said "fuck trump" what a vibe. we love living in early october 2020's political climate. hello me if youre reading this in 10 years, how did you fucking survive. anyway.
they had the genius idea of dming a world famous celebrity.
"hey could you like. adopt me? my family isnt accepting at all and im really unhappy. none of my 21384782934 fathers are lgbt and thats not the representation i need in my life, ya dig?"
but just like with kevboyperry, they knew it wouldnt even get seen. they threw the device onto the bed and walked into the kitchen.
their brother was crying in the corner while ben sat at the table eating a sandwich with nothing but cheese on it. what the hell.
"you know you should put some ham or something on tha-"
"i cant eat meat"
"arent you like the cannibalistic ruler of hell"
"i cant eat meat anymore"
oooh some lore. thats incredible-
ben kicked his feet up on the table and smiled nonchalantly "so what'd you think angel?"
damon blushed and glared at him playfully.
"it wasnt that bad. the edit. it was cool. yeah pretty cool man" they sat at the table beside him.
"what took you so long to get in here though?"
damon shot him a strange look. "i wanna get adopted"
ben choked
"BITCH YOU ALREADY HAVE 20 DADS"
damon raised a palm toward him
"no no not true! i got emancipated"
"from all of them?"
damon turned toward the fourth wall and winked.
ben shook his head, amazed. "but who would be your new parent-"
just then, the entire continent started shaking. damon got ptsd flashbacks from years ago when the house collapsed on them. ben howled.
BIGMEATYCLAWS emerged from the floor. "yo i be speedrunning this shit"
"huh???" ben hissed.
BMC, being a huge mass of arms and shit, pushed about 20 arms toward them. his hands opened and wouldnt ya know it. billie joe armstrong was standing there. in the flesh.
