𝑴𝒆𝒂𝒏𝒕 𝑻𝒐 𝑩𝒆 | ✔

Chapter 2

*Jay's POV*

"Just tell me why?" Will was driving me home and obviously pissed that it happened again.

"What am I suppose to tell you? Your not our dad or something and even then I didn't need to tell you anything." I looked at him and I really didn't feel like having to listen to a lecture right now.

"Jay. I don't know what you've been through in Afghanistan, but getting wasted nearly every day isn't the way to deal with it." He glanced over at me before looking back at the street.

"Works for me." I had seen too much and yet too little over seas.

"It doesn't. You can be glad that Lindsay arrested you and that you were allowed to leave." We were standing at a traffic light and my brother was looking at me.

"Well, if I was in a cell now, at least I couldn't get drunk again." I mumbled under my breath.

"You have to stop drinking so much. Or do you want to kill yourself?" I stayed quite when he asked.

"Jay give me an answer." I still didn't answer him and so he pulled over and stopped the car.

"Answer me or you'll walk home." Because I wasn't in the mood for him any more anyway, I got out of the car and started walking.

"Get back here!" Will ran after me, but I jumped over a gate that separated us because it was locked and my brother couldn't get over it.

Without looking around for him any further, I opened the door to a house, went up the stairs until I was at the roof and breathed in deeply.

I went over to the edge and sat down.

The view was breathtaking and the skyline looked great, because the sun was slowly setting and made the city shine in a particularly beautiful light.

The cars rushed through the streets below me, a light breeze was blowing around me and I closed my eyes to be able to feel all the things better.

For a brief moment I thought about whether it would be worth leaving all this behind, but then I saw her hazel eyes in front of me.
Her blonde hair and perfect face.

I sighed, opened my eyes and moved away from the edge, because it wasn't worth ending my life without not having used the chance to see Lindsay again.

With a queasy feeling how close it had just been, I went back down the stairs.

The temperatures got cooler when it got later, but I didn't want to get a taxi, I wanted to walk.

My thoughts jumped back and forth between memories.

One of my comrades lying on the floor screaming because his leg was cut off in an explosion.

My bestfriend Mouse sitting next to me in a tent.

Then the brief moment in which Lindsay's and my fingers had touched.

I held onto that thought because it was definitely the best my brain could offer me right now.

*Erin's POV*

"Are you aware that guy isn't in lockup?" Upton walked towards my desk.

"I am. I let him go." Her eyes widened when I said that.

"So you like him?" Her mood switched and she smirked.

"Hailey. I let him go because he didn't seem like the kind of guy that gets violent when drunk. Despite that his brother came here to get him and that should be fine then." I explained her and looked back at my paperwork.

"And who is his brother, that you let him go?" I forgot that Hailey didn't even get Jay's name because I did the arrest.

"His brother is Will Halstead. The doctor from Med." I explained to her and I saw that she knew who I meant.

"So the doctor's brother is an alcoholic? And before you tell me not to throw false truths around, the file says that he was picked up by the police several times whilst drunk." She points to the file in front of me.

"I've read that." I looked up at her.

"But if you had read on you would have seen that he has only recently returned from his second tour from Afghanistan." I snapped at her because I thought that it wasn't fair to talk about the guy like that.

"Whatever. Even if he was in the military, there is still no reason to get completely drunk." She looked at me like she was sure she'd won this discussion.

"You don't know what he'd seen there, did you? He will have reasons for his behavior." She rolled her eyes when I said that.

"Whatever, Lindsay. Maybe I'm gonna be replacing you with Rojas." She said and then sat down at her desk.

My look lingered a few more seconds on the mug shots that were in his file before I closed it.

"Maybe I should swing by his place and see how he's doing." I suggested and Hailey frowned.

"Forget about that. You might be thinking right now that you are feeling something for this guy, but maybe you're just sorry for him." Upton looked at me seriously and I slumped back into my chair.

"Who has feelings for whom?" Vanessa came up the stairs.

"Erin here has a crush on the guy she arrested earlier." She was informed by my partner.

"I stand by Lindsay. He wasn't exactly ugly. Do you have an address?" Rojas joked and I smirked.

"You two are unbelievable." Hailey got up and left to get herself a coffee.

"But seriously, are you going to go with me to his place? I kind of have a bad feeling." I had learned many times that I should listen to my gut.

"Sure." Vanessa's face turned serious and we went down the stairs.

"It should be right there." Rojas pointed to a tall apartment building.

"You think we should..." I stopped mid-sentece when I saw Jay turn the corner.

"Look, there he is." Rojas pointed out but my eyes were already fixed on him.

He looked our way but didn't seem to see us or at least didn't react because he unlocked the door and then went in.

I released my seat belt, but Vanessa grabbed my arm.

"Let it go." She looked into my eyes and after a little fight with myself I leaned back in the seat.

"It's not worth it." She sat next to me and just waited for me to be ready to drive back to the district.

"I know." I wasn't so sure about that, but I used Rojas as my voice of reason.

I started the car again and drove us back to the district.

"So. Have you talked to your lover?" Hailey teased me, but when Rojas cleared her throat, her expression changed and the mockery faded from her voice.

"We saw him." I walked past her and dropped into my chair.