Fight for us

Think of me

Ellie POV

"Logan" is all I need to say to know he shouldn't be eating a cookie in the morning but my parents are pretty laid back so I'm not surprised thats his breakfast, well part of his breakfast because once I walk in the house I'm doing him some cereal. Placing a kiss on my son's head I make my way inside trying not to give away that I hurt myself, I don't need my parents hovering over me or better yet wrapping me in bubble wrap like they have suggested. Hiding my pain well I make it to the kitchen without a problem, grabbing two bowls out the cupboard I sort myself a bowl feeling a little hungry after the run, thank god I am off today. Grabbing the milk out the fridge I pour it into the cereal knowing my son can do this himself but looking at him now at the table playing I knew I would have missed this, I feel better knowing Logan is playing with toys then technology even though he has a iPad which he's restricted too, he's only allowed on it for a couple of hours a day.

After breakfast my son throws himself on the couch in between my brothers like normally, its a little weird when we all have the same day off as we all lounge at our parents but theres a upside to it because Logan gets to play with his uncles all day, I have no idea what they actually have planned for today but I now know it involves my son. Since he came out his shell my son has been stuck to his uncles hips wanting to spend time with them, I feel slightly jealous but I know he's only missing male attention and I cant say I blame him. When Logan hangs with his uncles I feel like I have a little me time to sort everything out but theres a little bit of me that hates when my uncles cancel whatever they have planned to spend time with there nephew, I want my brothers to have a life also. Looking behind me I take one more look at my brothers and son before walking upstairs and grabbing a quick shower, I know when women say a quick shower thats it not quick but mine are simply in and out. Locking the bathroom door I strip out my clothes and once they hit the floor I hear someone running up the stairs

"Mummy I'm going shop with uncle joey" I hear my son shout but I don't have time to reply as when I open my mouth I hear his feet already run away from the door, at least I can take my time in the shower now without being interrupted by my son or brothers. Finally stepping into the shower I let the warm water run down my body before I do anything else, closing my eyes for a second my minds run around thinking about a time where I could be a family with Logan and Archer, I would like to think everything would work but I already had a happy family once and it didn't work but now I am finding reasons not to pursue it more. My feels for Archer are quite the clearest but I know I like him but do I like him enough to have a family ever after....

Laying on the sofa in a pair of mommy jeans and a white top I didn't realise I had gone sleeps till someone pushes my feet off the sofa, I don't even want to open my eyes to look because I know it wasn't my son because he would have jumped on me screaming something. Adjusting myself I hear someone clear there throat and now I open my eyes feeling like this could be a lecture but when I open my eyes it isn't who I thought it would have been instead its one half of my brothers looking at me like I stole his last cookie, but in all fairness he should have wrote his name on it then.

"When do we officially get to meet this doctor friend of yours" my brother asks while giving me a smile knowing he isn't going to be coming around here anytime soon but I don't want to speed into this, I want to take my time and if thats my brothers never really meeting him for another couple of months thats fine with me.

"Soon" I reply closing my eyes again but I shot them open when I don't hear my son at all, I know he went shop but that was some time ago, jumping to my feet I look around the house from where I'm stood only for my brother to indicating that he's sleeping, I stand facing him confused, wondering how long I was asleep for. Looking at my watch I take one look at the time before walking up towards the bedroom, I need to see my son and thats what I do. Once the bedroom does opens I see Logan sleeping in the middle of the bed with drool coming out his mouth, definitely Tristan's son.

Sneaking out the house like a teenager again I make sure I have my car keys in my hands before making my way to my car with a smile, Archer texted me about a hour ago asking me to come around, I wasn't sure I wanted to but he said he had the bonfire on and had marshmallows waiting and which girl doesn't love a good fire with marshmallows. Here I am now driving to his house for food and a cuddle under the stars, its like something out of a movie but I love the gesture and I couldn't turn it down. Tapping my fingers on the sterling wheel I hum to the song while driving to his, everything I may need for tomorrow is in a bag on the back seat, I am always prepared, I don't know what will happen after the marshmallows but I am prepared for anything. Parking my car next to Archers I don't even have to knock on his door before he opens it too me with a smile, I love his smiles the way its only for me but I love his eyes the most. Kissing him on the lips I find myself not wanting to stop but I know if we don't I'll properly end up in his bed which isn't always a bad thing but I came for the food.

"Hows the ankle?" are the first words out his mouth and I think I just lost myself in him a little more, Archer is definitely a sweetie always making sure I am ok and I give him a quick answer before making our way outside to the bonfire that he has set up. Looking around the garden he has fairy lights around the bonfire, I don't know what to think of this but its definitely romantic, if we have been together a little longer I would have thought he be popping the question but its a little early for that, just the though of him getting down on one knee has been thinking about bottling it for my car, I don't know if I ever want to get married again not after everything that I went though after losing Tristan.

I go quiet when we both sit down next to the fire I don't know what to say as I am a little scared about my thoughts, I arm not typically a person who runs when they are unsettled but right now that is my first thought. Lending back against the chair I try not to think about anything but look up to the sky looking at the stars but when I see one bright one I think about Tristan wondering if he's up there in peace. He always believed in the afterlife and I hope he's ok. Closing my eyes for a second I try not to tear up at the thought knowing I am in company, wiping the tears that escaped I think back to Archer and how much effort he put in for tonight, he's definitely a keeper.

"Thank you for tonight" I say looking into Archer eyes where I can get lost into them, he's a true gentlemen and I find myself looking forward to see where this goes, if only I could open my heart up fully to see if this could work instead of the 'what ifs'.