Tom Hiddleston and Loki Imagines - Bk. 1

Loki - Do You Understand?

        Your hands shook as you walked further into the royal gardens.  A million thoughts were flooding your mind as you neared the center.  Is my dress wrinkled?  Is my hair still neat?  Am I supposed to curtsey or bow before and/or after I offer the queen a cup of tea?  Do I even do those things?  Am I supposed to hand her the cup?  What if it's not to her liking?  Do I adjust it for her?

        It was your first day out the kitchen, serving instead of cooking, a handmaiden instead of a cook.  You had been grateful that Odin spared your life, but now you spent it locked up, confined to the walls of the Asgardian palace.  You hadn't been outside in years, let alone upstairs from the dungeon.  Unknowingly, you had helped Loki in his conquest of Asgard, and you were suffering now because of it.  Your family thought of you for dead, as did your best friend, with whom you shared feelings with.  You couldn't even say goodbye, your disapppearance a one-sided mystery.

        You took a deep breath as you spotted the queen, sitting ever so delicately at a small, circular gold table.  The other handmaidens were already attending to her: fanning her, rubbing her feet, brushing her hair.  Frigga, seeing you approach, greeted you with a warm smile that instantly calmed your nerves.

        "Hello, my dear.  Is that for me?"  She chuckles as you curtsey.  "Oh, please, that won't be necessary."  You quickly nod and present her with the tray, placing it down on the table.  She takes a teacup and smiles.

        "It's perfect, thank you." You smile, and she speaks up once more.  "You don't have to be afraid to talk to me.  All my handmaidens are free to speak around me."

        "Thank you, Your Majesty."

        "Just Frigga, dear."  It was hard to believe that she was Odin's wife, someone kind married to someone who treated you so harshly.

        "Is there anything more I can do for you?"  Before the queen could respond, there was a rustling of footsteps coming near.

        "Why Loki, whatever are you up to?"

        "I cannot visit my mother for afternoon tea?" he says, sitting down at the other chair.  She shakes her head.

        "Still haven't seen the barber, I see?"

        "Has Thor gotten the same lecture?"

        "Why yes, he has.  Neither of you listen."  As they laugh, Loki turns his eyes to you, his chuckles receding into a smile.

        "Oh, I see you have joined us?"  Frigga glances at you then turns back to her son.

        "You are acquainted with my new handmaiden?"

        "Ever so briefly, but yes, I do believe we have met."  He stands up, and circles you.  You swallow, not liking the way he eyed you, as if a trophy for the taking.

        "Maybe she would be better in your care."  You wanted to dart around, wanted to let her see your eyes widen, showing her the white of your eyes.  You wanted to speak up, but you knew better than to talk against Loki.  You had heard so many stories of the way he treated his male servants.  Why would he treat a handmaiden any differently?

        "Loki, I relinquish her under your authority."  With a smile, he pushes in his chair and starts to walk away.  You follow, knowing that it was your duty to do so.

        With every step, your heartbeat grew in pace and in strength.  Why wasn't it that he had a handmaiden before?  Why did he choose you?  Was it because you hadn't stopped him from taking over Asgard?  Was it because maybe, just maybe, if you pose as any type of threat, that he would spare your family, including your deathly-ill father, so you went along with his plans willingly?  You were so lost in your thoughts, that you hadn't noticed that the hallway was empty, that you had both turned the corner, and that he had grabbed you by the waist and hands and slammed you into the wall.  In a word, you were terrified.  In a few words, you were absolutely and most sincerely terrified.

        "I know who you are.  You are the daughter of (Father's Name), a mere commoner, a worthless peasant.  I knew of your motives then, and I know why you tremble in my grasp now."  Amused by the fear shining in your eyes, he chuckles.  "Not so brave now, are we, little ást?  Be careful with your words."

        "Does the commoner have permission to ask why?"  His wicked smile increases.

        "Remaining inferior, are we?  It's considered an honor to be this close to royalty."  You open your mouth ever so slightly to rebuke him, to correct him how he wasn't of Asgard nobility, but you quickly closed your mouth.

        "As regards to why, I do not need to answer.  You may be beautiful, but you are still a handmaiden.  You may not ask of my reasons, but may ask if you can assist me.  But just this once, I will give a response:  It is because I can, because you have haunted my every thought, because even though I could have ended your miseries, you effortlessly took the risk to find favor, to find life for your family even if it meant yours.  You haven't even flinched until then in the gardens, and that's all I needed to know that secretly, you were afraid of me, that I still had control of you."

        You wanted to continue to ask why, why this was so important to him, why he still remember someone as insignificant as you, why he gave you some level of honor even though he was constantly degrading you and reminding you of your rank, but you remained silent.  But your eyes, they were giving you away so easily.  Loki's own eyes darkened, and he slammed you against the opposite wall.

        "And this is why, darling, I must keep you.  You are dangerous, divergent, having the ability to hide your true motives, even for a second fooling me to think that I actually could rule someone because of their genuine loyalty.  And that is why you must stay close.  You have tried to have me believe that you were my servant, now here is what you asked for."

        "Loki, please--"  He grabbed your throat.

        "Silence!"  He came closer to you, his lips skimming your ear and he harshly whispered into it.  "This is what you wanted, isn't it?  To be ruled over?  Darling, you asked for this the moment the moment you gave yourself over to me."

        "Please--"  He tightened his grip on your neck, instantly quieting you.

        "I will be the first man to kiss you, to bed you, whether you come willingly or not.  You will be burdened, you will memorize every part of me.  You will crave the sound of my voice in your ears, the touch of my lips on your skin.  From the shoulders up and the waist down belongs solely to my touch.  You will be mine and mine alone, do you understand?"

        Shaking, you nod, and he releases you.

        "There now," he says kinder than before.  "Is not this simpler? Is this not your natural state? It's the unspoken truth of humanity, that you crave subjugation."