Being Brad's Sister

32. Reflecting and planning

Brad's pov

 I was up most of the night, the doctors and nurses where constantly telling me to try and get some sleep but no matter how hard I tried I just couldn't drift off. I was thinking about everything that has been going on in my life. Completely reflecting everything from being in school to where I am today. I thought about everything and everyone to see if I could at least get an idea as to what went wrong. Mum and Emma, me in hospital, dad deciding to split from mum. Where did my life suddenly go horribly bad?

When I found out when I was nearly two that I was going to have a baby sister to play with, I am not going to lie I was part excited but part of me was annoyed it wasn't a brother. But I was two so what did I know. It turned out that I loved my baby sister. I would always help out with her, play with her. We'd mess around together and annoy mum and dad as much as we could. It's what we did best. Emma and I have always had this ridiculously strong bond that could never break. I thought her how to play the guitar and we used to sing together and put on mini shows. Everyone would always say we would be the next brother-sister band. At school we were always there for each other. We were obviously in different years and there were a few years when we weren't in the same school because of the age gap but no matter what we would always be there for each other. We made new friends but we always found time to have some sibling bonding time. 

As we were growing up I could tell mum always favoured me because of the grades I was getting and she was putting ridiculous amount of pressure on Emma to get good grades which obviously didn't help. Then there is that time with my ex-girlfriend. We broke up because Emma saw her kissing another guy and cheating on me, she even took a picture so she had evidence but according to mum it was my close bond with Em that caused us to break up because she refuses to accept the fact the she would cheat on me because mum thought she was a little angel. Of course mum started planting ideas about Em in my head and for a few days, maybe even a week or two, I believed her and stopped talking to Emma then I thought about it and came to my senses. Does that mean that Em and the guys are telling the truth and this is another one of mum's stupid tricks to try and break the bond between Emzy and I? What has Emma done to mum that is so bad that she hates her so much?

All that also answers the question about why dad wants to break up with mum as well. Emma is a proper little daddy's girl and she is proud to be. She needs someone who can spoil her after the way that mum treats her. With dad seeing how mum treats Em I knew he was going to reach breaking point sooner or later because at the end of the day you have two children you treat them equally, you don't treat one like royalty and one like a piece of dog muck on the bottom of your shoe! So that is probably why he is thinking of leaving mum. 

Furthermore I was thinking about everything from Emma's perspective last night as well. I know that it would have been hard for her because mum was always putting the pressure on her to get good grades like me and to live up to my standards, which is rubbish if you ask me. But not only that but with me being in the band I suppose that she might be feeling as though if I leave her than she will have no one because she and I both know that without me there mum will try and get rid of Emma again and send her to live somewhere else or something. Emma doesn't know this but when she was younger mum tried to send her off to boarding school. Plus it means that I won't be spending as much time with her and we are basically inseparable. We are each other's best friends so to not be with each other is weird for us. Then there is the hate from some of the 'fans' because she is my sister. Maybe everything got on top of her and she really didn't mean it but she just exploded and shouted at me saying things she didn't necessarily mean. She did say in the card that she knew she would be hurt when  I left to tour so she tried to distance herself from me to make it easier when I did eventually leave for the tour. The more I think about it the more it sounds like something that she would do and I was stupid enough to not see what she was doing so I ended up getting hurt and Emma getting the blame for it.