Only my beginning: Natasha Romanoff x fem reader

Don't Feel Anything

Natasha POV:

Ultron was defeated, finally. The battle had been hard, long, tiring, but it was done. We tried to do as much damage control as possible, but we weren't perfect. I took the first plane back to New York as Tony insisted - my wounds were pretty bad, sometimes it sucks not being a superhuman. When I had left, Clint and Wanda were in pretty bad states over the loss of Pietro, it was sad, we hadn't known him for long but he was a good kid. Always had a funny comment to lighten the mood and was very noble.

Bruce came hobbling over to me, breaking my thoughts and sat down next to me. I smiled at him, grateful for the distraction, and he grinned back.

"Once we get back, you're going straight to the infirmary."

I shook my head, stopping his next sentence.

"Shower first, then infirmary."

"But you can barely stand on your own Nat!"

"I'll manage, thanks Bruce." Seeing that I wasn't going to change my mind, he dropped the subject and left us in silence. I soon let the vibrations of the plane send me into a painful and peaceless sleep, with images of the red room flashing through my subconscious. I woke up in a sweat, once more, to a startled Bruce. I waved him away, seeing that he was about to question me, but I was not going to explain myself to him. I had already shared my past with someone and was not going to do it again.

Y/N POV:

J.A.R.V.I.S. had sent me a mission report from the Avengers attack on Ultron. The first plane was to arrive in 15 minutes.

"There's one last thing Miss Y/L/N." J.A.R.V.I.S. said, sounding extremely tentative for a computer.

"Go ahead J.A.R.V.I.S."

"There has been a fatality. Pietro Maximoff."

Ringing started building in my ears as I registered what had just been said. I dropped to my knees, letting the tears fall from my eyes, clutching my stomach. Pietro had quickly become a brother to me, and Wanda a sister. 

Wanda. 

I stopped, as I realised how devastated she must be. Hearing the rumble of a plane landing, I pulled myself up and found my legs navigate myself to the plane. Bruce was the first one off, and seeing my expression, I could tell he knew I knew. His face softened and he looked down, which made me feel worse; made me feel more pain for Pietro's death. Looking back up, I saw Natasha limp fragilely off the plane. My stomach dropped as I rushed forward to her, pushing through my tears so I didn't worry her. Not that I should have worried about that, as soon as I got to her and started holding her, she collapsed in my arms. I scooped her up, and following Bruce's orders, took her to her bedroom. Laying her down on her bed, I assessed the damage. She had a deep cut in her thigh and several grazes on her cheek and arms. Taking off her jacket, I moved her body so that she was higher up on her pillows. Checking that she was breathing normally, I ran to my room to get my first aid kit and some spare clothes before starting to wrap up Natasha's leg wound. Once that was secure, I started cleaning her grazes with a sponge and warm water. Moving in circular motions, I let myself relax and just be with her, watching her chest rise and fall.

Natasha POV:

"Y/N?"

I woke to see the h/c girl sat beside me, gently rubbing my arm with a sponge. She looked down at my face as she heard my face, and she gave me a tender smile.

"Hey Natasha."

She had moved to my cheek, stroking it with a cloth, being very gentle and slow. She was so close I could hear her breath, and smell her perfume. I let the familiarity wash over me as I relaxed into her presence. Her breath hitched as I put my hand on hers, lifting it off my face, and setting myself up.

"I need to have a bath, I need to relax my muscles," I laugh looking down at the grime on my clothes, "and I probably smell."

"Okay, well, I go and run it for you." She said, walking into my bathroom, humming to herself. I watched as she bent down to turn the tap, taking in her figure, tracing it with my eyes. I snapped back to reality as I heard a knock on my door.

"Come in."

Bruce walked in with a bottle of pills. "Medication, since you refuse to come to the infirmary."

I take the bottle, chuckling, "Thank-you Bruce."

"Call me later, okay?" He called, walking out of my room, closing the door behind him.

Y/N walked back towards me, signalling to the door. "He seems sweet."

"Yeah, he's nice I guess." I shrug, not wanting to think about him anymore. Not when I was with her.

Y/N was smoothing her hands on her clothes, and waiting for me to look back at her. When I did she nodded back at the bath, which was filling quickly with bubbles.

"That's all ready for you Natasha. I've left some clothes on the side for you, and like Bruce said, call me if you need anything."

The sincerity behind her eyes made me melt, but before she could leave, I mustered up the courage to say;

"Could you stay with me?" Redness filled her cheeks as she looked back at the bath then to me, innocence filling her eyes. Pointing down at my leg, using the injury card to my advantage, I pleaded "I can't do it by myself."

Realising what I meant, she nodded, moving towards me, taking me by the arm and leading me into the bathroom.

"Get in, and the call me when you need help, I be right there," she uttered, pointing to my bed.

I smiled, closing the bathroom door and started to peel my clothes off. As I was doing so, I heard my bedroom door crash open and Y/N call, "Wanda!"

"Y/N, I need you, I don't feel anything." Wanda said, her voice breaking.

"Of course Wands," Y/N replied sympathetically. Calling to me, "I'm sorry Natasha, but I have to go."

I sighed to myself, sad that Y/N had to leave, but understanding why. "That's fine Y/N, look after Wanda. If I can't have you, she's lucky to."

This time she was right next to my door, almost whispering to me, "I'll come see you later Natasha, I promise." With that, I heard her walk out and the sound of Wanda's whimpering got quieter as they walked down the hallway. I slipped into my bath, and let the bubbles entertain me while she was gone.