Don't Look Back

Chapter 61

Sidney sat with astonishment and a churning stomach as Sir Radmore recounted what he and Georgiana witnessed the evening before. A sweat broke out as he finished with the expectation that officials would be round to question him.

Though he could not see the reaction of those around, he could sense their pity. It was not the sentiment most recent widowers receive. It was a different nature altogether.

"Will you send for Charlotte?" Georgiana asked suddenly, just when the silence of his thoughts was deafening.

Crowe's ears perked up, for if the elder Miss Heywood were to come, surely the younger one would possibly as well.

Sidney shook his head. "No use getting her involved in this mire. A murder investigation." he closed his eyes, pained. He wanted to shout, but he did not summon the energy.

He had come to London to be free of the woman, and now he was more unable to make promises than ever.

"I don't know what to write to my family," he said. "First, I am dead, and now it is the wife I wished to be free from." he scratched his overgrown beard. "The papers will have a field day."

"Damn the papers," Crowe said.

Georgiana nodded. However, Sir Radmore scratched his stubble.

"Well, we could offer them a story," he said. "Rather than bury ourselves in this scandal, perhaps you should face it head-on."

Sidney felt disgusted by this prospect, but Crowe, who was not in his cups as much as he was known to, agreed.

"Yes, and feed them the version we wish." he gestured with his hands before the gathering, but his friend did not see.

"I have no wish to air my personal affairs to the general public for scrutiny." He replied.

Georgiana, who sat beside him, shook her head.

"Too late. If it comes before a judiciary, then it is up for scrutiny. Might help if the public were on your side rather than not." her voice penetrated his defenses.

Crowe scoffed. "Better believe Lord Sellac is already thinking of paying off some paper to blacken your name and elevate hers." he laughed. "Even though it was he that done the deed. He has more than the resources and the motive now."

Sidney shook his head. "To imagine he would wish me to swing for it?"

Sir Radmore nodded. "He seemed to have planned the place. It was not arranged by him but by a man who fit your description as per the man who was the witness."

"Who was the witness?" Georgiana asked.

Sir Radmore shrugged. "Some man, well-spoken but from perhaps Antigua or one of the holdings there."

Her eyes fell, and she blinked. "Did you catch his name?"

He shook his head. "I am afraid the Nightwatchman did not divulge that information on that."

Sidney sensed something in her tone that sounded fearful, and he wished to ask her about it, but the company was too numerous and confined for much privacy to question the nature of her tone. Not to mention the alienation of the affection they had never really shared prevented him.

Since bringing her to London, whatever close bonds they had once shared seemed to untangle and shred bit by bit as they crossed the waves to the chilly island he brought her to.

When she had come of age, he half imagined she would go back to Antigua, but she had never left, and he feared asking her why. He did not wish to push her in any which direction and let her chose her path.

A fate stole from himself after the events of the Midsummer fire.

A lesson learned under most harsh circumstances which doomed him to such a richly deserved fate.

His thoughts were increasingly morose.

"I think you should write to Charlotte," Georgiana whispered.

"I would be better suited to find a solicitor to arrange my estate," he said through his teeth bitterly.

Crowe looked to Georgiana and shook his head to indicate that she should not press him. Their long history had made him all too aware of Sidney's threshold for pressure.

"That is enough for him to think on." He said. "The man needs a moment to process."

Sir Radmore nodded and looked to Georgiana, who looked at him with guarded eyes. Like, they held a secret, but all three hesitated at the door and looked back to Sidney.

"I will stay with him for a time," Crowe whispered. "Us miserable chaps have few things in common enough. Perhaps he can withstand the company."

Georgiana sighed and shook her head stubbornly.

"You will get him to write the letter." she pressed.

He shrugged with his eyes alone. "I can't make any promises to send for Miss Heywood, but I am in accord with your opinion."

She fluttered her lashes down.

"I can't help but think she could have a good effect on him," she whispered. "He has been in a sorry state since-"

"I can hear you," Sidney said dully from the chair behind them.
Crowe nodded.

"Of course you can. It is to your benefit to hear it," he muttered behind him.

Sidney leaned forward and rested his head in his hands, and sighed.

With that, Crowe turned with a forced bright smile. "Alright, I am going to need some brandy and cards." he requested.

"I can't see." Sidney leaned back in exasperation.

Crowe smiled and scoffed. "Yes, finally, I have a chance."

Sir Radmore nodded. "I am a miserable sort myself of late. I think I have some cards in my bag. I will come presently."

Sidney cursed and shook his head. "Can't just leave Georgiana out of your little party." he stood. "However, I am going to bed."

Crowe shook his head. "It is barely afternoon, and we are not sleeping."

"Well, I should not be drunk if the NightWatch Man comes." He protested.

Crowe laughed. "No, that is what you should be. Drunk and desolate." He smiled at the others. "Just picture it; he would not even need to act!"

Georgiana shook her head. "No, Sidney has a point. They were on the brink of a public divorce. He was reported dead, then rumored alive. It had not gone public yet that she attempted to murder him."

The men all listened.

"No, he should be sober." she nodded.

Crowe shook his head in disappointment.

"Sometimes, I just don't think you understand how men process things," he replied.

Sir Radmore laughed at that. "Why should she?"