Welcome to this book by @Bookfunreader123 and @riptide2406, also known as Amber and Selene. This is our special place where we roast every overused Riordanverse fanfiction trope available and write horrible cliché fanfiction to prove a point. If you...
Art Credit: @h-otokichan and @cindersart on Tumblr
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Disclaimer: Reading this chapter may cause extreme confusion and/or anger towards the authors for subjecting you to such torture.
(Because let's be real those books updated 50 years ago are very annoying.)
[Intro: Once again, the wonderful plotline starts with a gloomy rain cloud pouring its precipitation down on the cold ground. The camera moves down to display a boy in his teens sobbing over the bodies of two adults, a man with salt-and-pepper hair and a woman who seems to be the man's wife.] [No, the authors could not find a description worthy enough to describe her.]
Tears rolled out of Percy's blue orbs onto the cold hard ground, as he yelled, screaming into the darkness at the fate of his parents' death. They had died of mysterious causes. The readers suspect that this was just the author's "plot convenience" at play.
He got up and ran off to the only other place he could call home: CBH.
As Percy reached CHB, he found the camp in flames and his brother Nate River Waters muahaha-ing on the remains, because now he was suddenly immune to fire.
Percy remembered the dream he had before reaching CHB when Gaia, Tartarsauce, Loki, Apophis, Kronos and Nate discussing taking over the world. He pulled a Luna Moon and passed out. He woke up in Artemis's camp and kissed his girlfriend Arty. Then Chaos appeared and told him to become his lieutenant Alpha Omega And-Other-Greek-Letters-For-A-Name. Then he and his girlfriend Thalia boarded Chaos's ship.
Meanwhile, in the background that we supposedly never got to see, there was a zombie apocalypse happening at Hogwarts. It was the Yule Ball because the Triwizard Tournaments had made a wonderful comeback. Percy danced with y/n gracefully, because Kronos had cursed him as a kid to be able to become a human time turner and be present at a billion places at once.
The Seven fought in another Battle of Hogwarts and died. Gaia killed them.
Meanwhile, in ANOTHER setting, Nico was breaking up with Will because he wanted to get with Thalia.
Then Percy woke up in his dorm room at Hogwarts beside his girlfriend Calypso. They woke up and entered the kitchen. Steve was surprised to find Persia and her boyfriend Jason awake so early. So, he made them pancakes for dinner. Then Percy's uncle Bruce Wayne entered and took him to Vormir to build things.
Then Thanos threw Percy off the cliff, and he met Natasha. Then Natasha introduced him to her sister Sally. Then Percy realized Sally was his mom, then Gaia stabbed her. As she lay dying, she told Percy to meet his dad's sister Mary Poppins. Then Mary Poppins did the supercalifragilisticexpialidocious dance, and then she adopted him and introduced him to her nephew Peter Parker.
Then Percy entered Goode High School with his besties Carter, Jason, Lester and Magnus. He saw Annabae and said "Ew, I hate that nerd. I'm the most popular bad boy in this school, I could never fall for her."
"Dude, that's my cousin," said Magnus.
"Dude, I'm a nerd," said Carter.
Then Alex came up and beheaded everyone in the school. This is a mortal AU by the way.
Christina came up to Percy and started flirting with him with her natural blonde hair and violet orbs. Percy pushed her away and kissed Annabae passionately.
Annabae giggled.
Then all the gods of all the pantheons came and said that the gods are real. Bryce stood up and claimed himself to be the son of Odin. Then he bullied Hazel after which Nico sliced him into pieces.
Then Percy took his rightful place as Aqualad, the prince of the seas. Then there was a huge fight. Persia was pushed off a cliff. She hung on by one arm.
