Welcome to this book by @Bookfunreader123 and @riptide2406, also known as Amber and Selene. This is our special place where we roast every overused Riordanverse fanfiction trope available and write horrible cliché fanfiction to prove a point. If you...
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
• APPEARANCE
-The variety of physical appearances ranges in almost every fanfiction.
-Mostly goth/ emo who listens to MCR.
-Or "bad boy" who skips classes, probably does illegal stuff and is very smooth with pickup lines.
-"Smol broken gay bean who needs an obnoxiously sunshine-y bf to *heal* him".
-Peak of infantilization, especially because he's queer.
-Seriously, the fanfic authors refuse to believe he's stronger than he looks, physically and emotionally.
-They also assume that the canon Nico wouldn't kill Octavian the second he touches a hair on his head.
• FANFICTIONS IN GENERAL
-The main story revolves around him being gay and broken.
-Will enters dramatically to "heal him". The idea of them actually being a genuinely good dynamic is crushed slowly and painfully into a ball, and then thrown in the garbage can.
-Hardly any elaboration on his other platonic relationships.
-Percy or Octavian is usually the weird toxic ex.
-He realizes they are not worth it and moves on with the new hot blonde boy.
-They get married and adopt (read: steal) Grover and Juniper's 2.5 children.
-One of them is obviously named Bianca.
-Their children are all immaculate child prodigies, with extreme levels of sass that makes their Uncle Percy so jealous that he starts annoying everyone around him with the 'not my type' jokes once more (and probably begs his wife to make more children with the names of their dead friends, but that's a story for another day).
The children have so many powers that the cow stops jumping over the moon just to bow down to them.
In conclusion, they all live happily ever after.
• INSTAGRAM AU
-Hardly ever posts. When he does, it's mostly about Will.
-"You look amazing, sis 🖤"
-"GET BACK HERE, JACKSON-!"/ "Shut it, Jackson."
-"WILLIAM, I told you not to post that >:("
-You will mostly find variations of these three dialogues throughout the story, unless he's getting married.
• NICO X READER
-Y/n is female. Every single time.
-Here's a snippet of what a happily ever after looks like in such fanfictions:
"Nico's POV
It was Christmas morning, and the snow fell outside like my self-esteem down to the ice covered ground. I woke up to my beautiful children, Bianca, Bianca and Bianca jumping on top of me and my beautiful wife, y/n.
I smiled softly to myself, something I hadn't done in years, because I had to keep up my stereotypical emo personality. I gave Bianca, Bianca and Bianca a tight hug, whispering, "Te amo" softly in their tiny ears, completely ignoring the fact that I was actually speaking Spanish and not Italian.
I glanced back at my wife, her sleeping face resembling that of an angel's. Her stomach rose and fell gently and I could hear her slight snores. I giggled and pecked her lightly on the cheek, and she smiled softly in her sleep.
"Good morning, babe. Merry Christmas!" I whispered gently in her left ear.
Her majestic ruby eyes fluttered open, and I felt like Thanatos was cross-jumping with my intestines.
My children cackled like baby vampires who had found the joys of blood-sucking and landed on top of y/n, while screaming "mother" like tortured donkeys.
