ADHD Dribblings: Poems & Thoughts From A Mind Lost In Motion

Everyone's No One

There once was a girl,
who belonged to no one.
Nobody's darling,
Like her sister's sun.

She saw the err,
In a heart cold and scared.
She saw the flaw,
To reject the love of all.

So she deviated,
And became everyone's.
Not nobody's, not someone's,
But everyone's no one.

She lived without needing,
And needed without loving,
And loved without seeking,
And longed without living.

She belonged to no one
And belonged to everyone,
Who had nothing
And wanted everything.

They came in droves,
Fueled by their nothing.
Wanting her love,
And to feel like life's something.

Until one day,
She felt a change.
There was nothing left to lose,
And nothing left to gain.

She couldn't move forward,
And she dared not move back.
The heart needs an other,
To keep beating back.

She pushed it aside,
The ache a distraction.
To love is to leave,
This yearning unacted.

When the time came,
She knew it'd be right.
But she grew more afraid,
With each passing night.

She lit up the darkness,
With her own flames.
And became less afraid,
Of those shouting her name.

She danced in her fire,
And heard all their songs.
She found a burning again,
To be something more to someone.

She begged the moon,
And she begged the stars.
She made deals with devils,
And asked for one, just one, to be hers.

She didn't care how long.
She didn't care how far.
She didn't care how brief.
She didn't care how hard.

The everyone's answered,
Made their nothings well-known.
They clouded her nights.
Their voices rang and droned.

She trembled and shook,
And ran away from their buzzing.
Louder and louder,
The hums of the nothing.

She was tired of how empty,
their words made her feel.
Of course they wanted her,
She was a "catch" and "unreal".

Up, up, up,
They tried to build her.
Their plight:
Give her flight.

To see just how high,
Her brightness showed clearly.
To see just how long,
Her shadows cast nearly.

For her shadows were
as close as they'd get.
To touching her wings,
And tasting her breath.

She looked down from the pedestal.
She could just step off...
She needed air.
She needed to fall.

But the foundation was cracked.
It gave her what she wanted,
And down she fell,
Back into her darkness.

She rose from the rubble,
A phoenix to ashes,
And they lifted her again,
Lit up by her magic.

But this time she flew
She danced and she twirled
She was her own,
Just a girl to the world.

Then he walked in.
She couldn't believe it,
That everything could be someone,
Or that she'd live to see it.

He was kindness.
He was care.
He was light in the dark.

He craved night.
He craved flight.
He caved right at the start.

But caves are enclaved,
Deep holes built in large rocks.
Some made by the earth,
Some brought out by bombs.

He caved in his cave,
To every earth's shake.
And cowered alone,
As his quarry quaked.

She knew the feel,
And she knew the release.
A bit of lava to spew,
Can keep you at ease.

She looked to the sky,
But there was only blacklight.
He kept his cave empty.
He kept it airtight.

She felt the rumble,
Before the earth felt its shake.
She offered a hand,
With hopes he might take.

But he knew himself,
More than he could know her.
More than she could know him,
No matter what the earth told her.

She walked in the night,
As his cave rattled and shook.
She cried out to the sky,
At her hiding moon.

"That was too short!"
"Life is but a phase.
Your wish went as promised.
You gave what you gave."

She walked ever further
As if distance was needed.
Maybe he'd come out,
And see what she heeded.

Then came the crash,
She felt it crumbling.
Felt from afar,
Felt with her something.

She fell to her knees,
And grabbed at the earth.
You can't stop the shock,
Nor its return.

She wanted to ask,
But couldn't utter the words,
"Shall I be less? Was it I-
that moved this great earth?"

She chewed them all up,
And swallowed them down.
Earth didn't shatter,
When she rose from the ground.

Phoenixes rise,
And still they can fall.
Their ashes can blow,
Create daybreak's fog.

He knew inside,
And he knew his rubble.
He knew all his pieces,
And was sure of his troubles.

So the wind came in strong,
Bringing seasons of change.
She felt its chill,
The creeping sound of her name.

Louder they called,
Hungry cries of the nothing.
Great empty fools,
With great empty bellies.

She weeped for a moment,
Before she could smile,
"I gave everything I had,
To be someone for a while."

She wiped away her tears
And stretched up real tall,
Preparing herself,
For another great fall.

She looked ahead to the crowd
And back to her shadow.
He was rebuilding,
Cementing rocks in his meadow.

He looked up from his work,
Shade thick in his eyes.
Grateful for a moment,
Sun's light failed to demise.

She took a deep breath
And gave him a nod,
And took off towards the crowd,
Everything to everyone.

🌘10/13/21🌒