Lock the door, shut it tight.
And bar the outside.
Don't you know all about
How it's safer inside?
I'm sorry you're scared,
I swear I'll be fine.
I don't fear closed doors,
Much less those opened wide.
I used to, I know,
How you won't hear who enters,
Or notice what looms
In dark doorways or corners.
I used to shut them all.
I would run, feeling small.
And quick with a slam,
Race back like a thief on the lam.
And any new place,
I dared lay my head,
I'd make all my rounds,
Closing entries 'fore bed.
But as I lived alone,
And grew used to my noises,
And shut out the darkness,
With the glow of one lightswitch,
My fear slowly eased.
My anxiety subsided.
After living alone,
I crept out of my hiding.
I left doors unlocked,
One floor off the ground,
I knew those below me,
Knew my footstep's clear sound.
And they knew of my patterns,
So when they didn't sound right,
They knew to check in,
On any given night.
Locked doors they remain,
In night time's formality,
But come daybreak, they open,
Without fearing faux reality.
And so as you leave me,
Again, checking my door,
To close it behind you,
Shut out once more.
I put my hand on the lock,
And say with a smile,
"This door's always open,
When your fears grow less wild."
11/17/21
YOU ARE READING
ADHD Dribblings: Poems & Thoughts From A Mind Lost In Motion
PoetryA collection of poems dealing with love, loss, PTSD, disability, ADHD, addiction, depression, suicide ideation, eating disorders, women's rights, processing abuse & trauma, etc. Some are just making intrusive thoughts rhyme, some are just thinking...
