We Meet Again(Cedric/Edward)

9-Edward's inner monologue

Edward

It was hard to see Sabrina the next day at school, knowing what I did.
Knowing who she was.
She was a witch.
I finally understood why her head seemed empty.
I finally unravelled the mystery of why she didn't succumb to my charms.
She was gifted.
I started to wonder—what other creatures existed which I didn't know of?
Did fairies exist? Did mermaids exist? Did elves exist?
The curiosity was painful.

I was sitting next to her in biology class. I had grown to like her more over the month I had spent in her company. Or rather, the month I spent observing her.
She didn't know I was.
But I was much too selfish to stop now. She could stop the curiosity to burn my insides. She could answer my questions.

There I was, sitting right next to this beautiful, selfless girl, her pain unknown to most people. Mike still saw her as his prey, his prize, his shiny new toy to show off. To prove that he would have gotten her. Not me, not Eric, him.

Leo kept having strange dreams about her and me. Human me. Or my twin, I don't know.
But now, she had her own dreams. She came into his mind as the main focus of the dream. I wasn't always with her in them. Or, Cedric wasn't.
From reading his mind regularly I figured the boy who looked like me was, in fact, Cedric.
And considering that Sabrina was a witch from an unknown world full of lunatic murderers, I was starting to think it was real.

When she saw me, she had told her friends at her table that I looked familiar.
And then in Biology, she had whispered his name.
Cedric.
She thought I was Cedric.
I would've too if I were her; I had to admit the ressemblance was evident.
But this led me to a conclusion: Cedric was real. The dreams where Sabrina lay next to his body, they were real.
It was all real.

She was a witch who went to a magic school, and fought off an extremely powerful evil wizard. She skipped school to go looking all around England for tiny objects to destroy him.

That about summed it all up.

Leo had had dreams on that subject, too.
Or, visions.
I would sometimes see a quick flash of a cup being cut by some sort of fang, or a locket by a silver sword.
And considering what she told her father, what she unknowingly told me, it was real.
All of it.

And here I was, sitting in the presence of a hero. A brave, strong girl.
And she didn't even tell anyone.
She didn't show off. She didn't boast.
She was quiet.
She cried alone, when she thought no one could see her.
But I could see her.

There I was, looking at her through others' heads, not paying attention to the teacher.
If he were to ask a question, I would simply read his mind in search of the answer.
It was a relief Sabrina was the only one I couldn't read.

There I was, admiring her features. I had known her for two months, but it felt like years.
Each day I grew more intrigued by her.
The emptiness which occurred to me every time i tried to read her mind again, only made my curiosity grow more.

Leo was still having the dreams, and now they were of wide variety. I had seen some visions where Cedric and Sabrina were both wearing quite expensive looking clothes, pearls around the girl's neck, and her hair tied up, a silky dress wrapping around her body,while he wore a suit, dark robes and a bow tie. They both danced and smiled. They really did look in love.

And slowly, I had realised that I was doing just that. I was falling in love with her.
Not for her beauty, or the idea of a shiny trophy to show off.
But because of her selflessness.
Because of her bravery, and hidden pain.
Because of her scars.
Because of her strength.
Sabrina Jones was strong. She had dealed with much more than was acceptable for a girl her age.

But I, in comparison, was and am, to this day, a cold and frozen creature.
I was, and remain, no matter how much I try to deny it, a monster.
I was frozen in time forever, and would never get my life back.
I would never get the feeling of blood in my veins again.
I would never have an active heart again.
I didn't live a life.
I was just there.
And I had accepted, before I met Sabrina, that that was how my existence would be, and stay, forever.

But now, I wished nothing more than to be human again.
I wished I could feel the blush rush to my cheeks again whenever the girl I fancied looked at me.
I wished I could grow old, and mature physically with time.
I wish I could change back.
But as the tormented girl said, dreams don't tend to come true.

I could wish all I want, but I would always be a cold and frozen monster.
And I would never go back to the way I was.