Wow. I am having so much fun writing this story. I was really apprehensive because I didn't want to disrespect Chris Hemsworth or be intrusive. But this has been such a wonderful escape for me.
Sometimes I fear that it's unhealthy for me to be so happy to bury my head in this story but real life is so disappointing and humdrum. Every single day is the same spin of the hamster wheel. This story, like many others I've written or am writing, is my way of living the lives I wish I had. I honestly don't think I'd be here right now if I couldn't write.
In thinking about how I use writing and daydreams and fantasy, I find myself thinking about how long I've done this. When you've always done it, it's hard to pinpoint where it started.
When I was a very little boy I was making up fantasy stories in my head and pretending they were my life to escape my home life and school life. I never fit in or felt loved so I made up these fantasy lives where I did.
Now I still do it to cope with life. Is it healthy? Is it normal? Am I a freak? I don't really know the answer to any of that. I only know that depression is always hanging over my head like a huge sword waiting to be dropped on top of me. And the only thing that keeps it from killing me is my ability to escape through my writing.
I've always known in my heart that depression is likely to be the thing that kills me. Sometimes I think my heart will just get so fucking tired and just give out from it. Feeling depressed is like being stuck in the dark and you can't find the light switch even though you're desperately clashing up the walls for it. Writing these stories is my light switch.
Thank you so much for reading. Thank you for being interested. It makes me so happy when I see that people are reading my stories. I hope that you're finding joy in what I'm sharing. That would make me so glad. Just knowing that someone is reading what I've written and smiling let's me know that I'm putting something good into the world.
As usual, these musings are probably so nonsensical sounding. It's always emotional word vomit with me. Thank you if you've made it this far and thank you for reading.
Love,
Luminous Avenger
YOU ARE READING
A Chance Encounter (Chris Hemsworth X OMC)
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