||Secrets|| Bucky Barnes<3

||Chapter Thirty Four||

||Bargaining and Depression||

7 months have passed since he's been in that cell. Bucky has now moved from anger to Bargaining, continuing to ask himself, "What if this happened instead".

But today all those questions are pushed aside, he just got done with a session with Okoye. Now he was softly singing Happy Birthday, over and over.

"Happy birthday to you... Happy birthday to you... Happy birthday to my baby girl... Happy birthday to you." His voice was slow and he didn't rush it, he let all the notes play out.

He was in the fetal position against the glass, in a corner. Today was another really big heartbreak for him. He wasn't just randomly singing Happy birthday to Knox, today is her birthday.

He wants to cry but at this point he's numb, no tears want to come out. Some part of him wants to scream and punch everything he can, cause a scene, but the other part can't even hear that request.

The door had opened up and Bucky heard footsteps and then Steve appeared in his vision, but Bucky continued to sing, just softer.

"Look Bucky. I know I haven't been the best. Things are very messed up right now." Steve said calmly.

Bucky stopped singing and raised an eyebrow at his ex friend. "I was supposed to marry Knox. Johann Schmidt and Armin Zola trusted me with her. And I blew her up." And just like that Bucky had realized he stopped Bargaining and went straight to Depression.

That's why he numb.

"It's just. I don't want to think that I did that. I want to blame it on someone else." Bucky said flatly, not showing any emotion.

"And that's okay Buck. You don't want to be the one that kills your lover." Steve responded as he pulled up a chair. "We're going to fix you. I promise."

"We're? As in we? Because it seems to me that it's only Okoye." Bucky says lifting his head up to look at Steve.

"I'm finding a way for you to redo your reputation. So when you fight out there with us, you'll look like a hero. Not The Winter Soldier from Hydra." Steve explained.

"I'm only going to be a hero because of a promise. Not because I really want too." Bucky admitted.

"Don't worry Buck, after you fight with us—fight with me. You'll like it." Steve had reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a strawberry pop tart. "I thought you might want something other than the food you've been eating. Something sweet."

Steve slid the pop tart through the food hole and Bucky didn't want to get up, but did anyways. He walked all the way up to the treat and grabbed it. He opened it up and was hesitant, but took a bite anyway.

He had to admit to himself, he missed the taste of pop tarts, Chocolate, plums, everything he usually ate and liked.

"Thank you Steve." Bucky said softly.

"You're welcome buddy." Steve matched Bucky's tone.

Knox and Bucky had been laying together in Bucky's bed, it was getting close for him to leave for the plan and Knox honestly didn't want him to leave her.

"What if I come with you?" She asked. Bucky chuckled.

"I don't need you getting hurt." He said, running his hand up and down her arm.

"Okay, what if I Visit you?" She asked.

"Are you trying to bargain with me?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Possibly." She admitted, returning the loving touch Bucky was giving her and ran her hand up and down his chest.

"One year. That's all it will take. Just one year." He reassured her, then kissed the top of her head.

The two spent as much time together as they could. Trying to make the most out of the time they had left together.

The closer the day of him leaving became, the more melancholy she became. Slowly she started getting depressed, knowing she'll have to not see or talk to him for a whole year.

All of that leading to her accepting that he has to do this, as well as accepting that she can't live without him.

That was when she decided she would have to find him.

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