quick disclaimer, I did change the dates so that Monse could at least spend Christmas with Rosa.
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𝐃𝐞𝐜𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐞𝐫 𝟐𝟒𝐭𝐡 - 𝐌 𝐨 𝐧 𝐬 𝐞
I wake up and I'm basically spooning Rosa. She was on her phone watching something on youtube. "Buenas Dias, mami. ¿Cómo te sientes?" I kiss the top of her head as I pull her closer. "Better than last night," she grumbles. "Good. Where's Papi?" I reach over her to grab my phone.
"He said he's going to work, then hang out with Tio Oscar," she tells me. I roll my eyes because he, Rosa, and I were supposed to spend time together, but he wants to be a dick and ditch us. "You eat anything yet?" I get up and start to stretch.
"No. I'm not hungry," she tells me. I furrow my brows as I get up off the bed, "Mija, you need to eat". "I can'tttttt, and I won't," she pouts. "You cannnn, and you will. Let's go," I basically pull her off the bed. I hold her hand as we walk downstairs to the kitchen.
I hear the doorbell ring and instantly run to the door, knowing it's Jasmine. "I come bearing gifts," she holds up grocery bags. "Good," I take the bags from her. "Where's Cesar?" we walk into the kitchen. "Ditching us for Oscar," I put on my glasses.
I see my phone buzz, it's a message from Cesar.
𝕭𝖔𝖔 𝖙𝖍𝖆𝖓𝖌🌹🤞🏽//11:56 AM Sorry, I ditched, hanging w Oscar for the day.
I just left him on read. Not to be an asshole or anything, but his daughter matters more than a bum ass hang out with Oscar. "Hang out or sneaky roll-up?" she raised a brow. "Hang out. We have stuff here," I shrug as I pull out the groceries. "Oh, my," she snorted.
I groaned, "we're gonna fight when we get home, I already know it". "Why?" she asks as she cracks a few eggs in a bowl. "Because I left him on read. He knew we were all supposed to spend the day together as a family, but he ditched. Guess you're my boyfriend today". I roll my eyes.
"Guess so," she laughs a little. "What'd you and Ruby do the other night? Took you guys a good minute to get more bowls," I smirk as I start warming up Rosa's tea. "Okay, I got some! I gave in and I gave it up!" she admits out of embarrassment.
I smack her arm, "I thought you were all about self-care!" I scold. "I know but that don't mean he can't take care of this pu-" she gets cut off by loud thumping upstairs coming from my room. I drop everything and I've never run so fast in my life.
I rush into the room and my eyes widen. Rosalia's playing with our condoms. "Mija what-" Jasmine's expression changes. "Oh, Dios Mio," I whisper to myself as I walk over to Rosa. "Mommy, Mira Los globos!" she tries to blow one up.
TRANSLATIONS ~ Mira Los globos = look at the balloons!
I sigh, "yeah... so cool". I bend down, "can we clean them up?". "Yeah," she giggles as she picks up all types of colored condoms. I clean up the wrappers and empty the trash. When we're done I pull her aside, "I don't want you playing with those again. They're for Mommy and Papi".
She gives an understanding nod and goes to her room. "Told you, you guys can't hide for shit," Jasmine chuckles. "Apparently," I run my hand through my curls. I take a shower and get ready before Rosa can even start asking when it's time for her medicine.
"You ready for your medicine?" I walk into her room brushing my long-ass hair. Need a haircut fr fr. "Mhm," she follows me into her bathroom. I give her the medicine, then get her ready after me.
"You look so pretty, mamas,' I smile as we walk downstairs. "Thank you," she holds my hand. "Tia's gonna take you to Abuela's for the weekend," I tell her as I help put her coat on. I give her, her bookbag, "be good for Abuela, I love you". I give her a hug and kiss, she does the same thing back.
-
I finally finish wrapping presents at about 10 something after spending the day with Jas along with Mari I'm exhausted. And I am not in the mood to fight tonight. I get an Instagram notification saying that Jasmine tagged me in something.
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I like the post then go upstairs to our room to lay down. I put my headphones in and one specific song comes on. When I found out I was pregnant with Rosa.
I was so scared to tell Cesar, I avoided him for a good month until he showed up at my dad's house assuming the worst of me. I was terrified when I told my dad, but he didn't react the way I thought he would... he accepted things the way they were and that's why I go to him for things.
My mom on the other hand... was only worried about my future which I completely understood, but then she ghosted me for a whole two weeks. Jane handled it so well it was like she didn't even care about it, but she supported us and kept us going throughout the pregnancy.
And it's like, I love that Cesar wants me to have his kids, start a family, but I feel like it's gonna be so stressful with two little kids running around. Maybe we'll talk about it after the new year. I pull out my headphones, then go downstairs into the junk closet.
I'm so in my head about this baby situation it's driving me crazy. I get that I'm bipolar and all but all this is eating me up inside!
(If y'all don't know what a hookah is, it's basically a vape except it's way bigger than one. Gonna give Monse some of that rq)
I drag the hookah into the living room, sit down facing the tv, pack it, poke the holes, light the coals, then just start taking hits of it. I feel like I'm having a panic attack, stressing so much over something that isn't even a big deal.
I curl my legs up to my chest and start rocking back and forth trying to calm myself down, clenching onto the hose of the hookah. I hear the door open, causing my eyes to dart to it. Just Cesar. "Baby, what's wrong?" he rushes over to me. "I- I don't know," I start to cry.
I don't know why, but I am. "Shh, it's okay. Just breathe," he holds me. I try to control my tears which is somewhat working. I managed to control myself and calm down.
This... needs to stop.
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I just wanted to get this chapter done so there's not as much.
~Monse leaving Cesar on read?
~Cesar ditching Rosa and Monse?
~Monse?
~Cesar?
~Rosa?
~Make sure to VOTE and answer all questions above :)
