The 80/20 Rule // knj [COMPLETED]

19 • Routines

🎭 Natheda 🎭

"I had no idea Becci was even pregnant. The night she and I conceived Jules is the only time I ever went to that club."

"'Becci'?" I scoff. "Did you and Becci  'reconnect' after our split?"

"Yes and no. Jules and I were celebrating his second birthday. My parents were at the apartment with us when Becci stopped by. She had a gift for him."

"Mmhm."

"I understood her situation and the reasons why she couldn't keep our child. I won't ever think poorly of Becci knowing now how difficult her home life was then. In hindsight, I am thankful she gave Jules to us. You were so wonderful to him."

Thinking back to the first tiny baby I ever held makes my heart soft. "The circumstances of his birth were not his fault. He didn't deserve to be mistreated."

"In a funny way, he helped to raise me. I had to be a role model for my son to admire as he grew up. I gave my all in everything I did and now Jules is an exceptional young man with a bright future and, as of our conversation earlier this week, he has a young lady he wishes to make his bride."

Though I am proud, I hold in my smile. "Good for him."

"He misses you," Namjoon says bringing his glass to his lips.

I nod gently twirling my glass between my fingers. "He was a good kid. I'm glad to hear he's doing so well."

"He asked me to give you his number should I run into you tonight. He said that he would love to see you again."

I grin to myself. "I'll have to call him then."

"He also asked me why I fucked up so bad with you," Namjoon chuckles uncomfortably. "He found so much joy in the Sunday outings you planned each week. He said being an older brother would have been amazing for him as long as it meant you stayed in his life."

"You mean neither you nor his mother gave him a sibling?"

Namjoon clenches his jaw. "His mother gave him a few. Jules meant you and I giving him a sibling."

My tummy flutters. Laying a hand over my abdomen, I softly clear my throat.

"Oh."

We are silent for a few moments before Namjoon speaks again. His question comes as no surprise.

"Do you ever wonder what our child would have been like, Theda?"

I try to keep it cool. "Occasionally, but it doesn't take up too much of my mind."

"I remember how caring you were with Jules. I'm sure you would have been just as loving if you ever had your own biological child."

"I am just as loving, maybe doubly so."

Namjoon's big body locks up. His face goes pale when my words sink in.

"You have a child?"

I smile proudly. "I do, and my son Na'im is my world."

FLASHBACK: ELEVEN YEARS AGO
AGE: 32

🎭 Natheda 🎭