What We Are

Don't turn me away

Three weeks before

"Lindsey that's wonderful!" She said appreciatively as I played back the guitar intro to the song. "Well it's just a simp-"
"Shut up Mr. Humble all of a sudden, I can well remember your fights with John over who was the better string instrumentalist!"
"Well..." I opened my mouth and raised my hands in mock surrender.
"Drink?" She said swivelling on her office chair and poking my shoulder.
"Later."
"Why not now?"
"I thought we had plans?"
"What pla-" I kissed her, then pulled away slightly to admire her. "Oh...Those kind plans." She smirked.
"Wanna go upstairs?" I said, pushing a strand of her golden hair behind her ear so I could see into her large eyes free of obstruction. This was a similar scene to many over the past few days. Every time I looked at her, but especially like this, something burst inside of me. Everything came flooding back, the pain yes, but the pleasure especially. I was once again privately caught up in the dream of staying with her. "Nope, I'm fine here honey."
"Ah, ok..." I moved to stand before her, and kneeled down to kiss the insides of her leggings, slowly moving up, locked in her gaze, lifting up her dress to gently suck the material over her thighs. "Lindsey..." She moaned, fiddling with my hair. I rose and caressed her where she needed me, her hips lifting off the seat slightly, her nails scratching my shoulders. I leant to kiss her again, this time our tongues met and yielded to each other. She held me closer and I held her waist and turned so that she was straddling my lap. She tugged at my shirt "Off," and I was more than pleased to oblige. She pulled my zipper down as I helped her remove her dress over her head, my hands becoming tangled in its chiffon layers. "Do we get an Olympic medal after this?" I laughed.
"I can think of something better," she said quietly, shooting me a seductive look. I took her right breast into my mouth and enjoyed both the sensation of sucking it, and her indistinguishable vocal reactions. "Get your trousers off!" She demanded as I yanked her panties away and threw them on the floor to her amusement. It was just her enchantment and growing wetness above me, and me in my boxer shorts now. She shuffled to kneel between my legs, and everything within me missed her closeness. She smiled mischievously as she slowly pulled down my boxers, kissing my knees. "This is torture!" I cried ruffling her hair. "Get back here Steph!"
She simply giggled and sat back on me. I held her face in my hands and explored her mouth, looking at her and darting my arms to her sides to aid her as she descended on me. A small gasp escaped her mouth as I hit her deep inside. I jerked my hips up and down as I nuzzled her neck and caressed her chest. "Oh god," she whined as I looked up at her. "Are you ok angel?" I said kissing her cheek.
"Mmm," she groaned in a fluster, her eyes closed, digging her nails into my back.
"Say it." I whispered into her ear. Her eyes opened and I saw water welling in them.
"Baby I l-" A loud ringing threatened to disturb our absorption in one another, but I simply gripped her closer to my chest, showing her that I didn't care about anything but her in that moment. "It's ok, leave it." A look of hurt spread across her face as I continued to repeatedly plunge as deep as I could within her, I cupped her face, slowing down as the phone continued to blare,"Steph?" I asked worriedly, stopping and stroking her waist.
"It's your wife, I can see your phone on the table". I turned a little to see she was correct, still holding her, then whipped back around immediately, knowing I'd done something terribly wrong. She climbed off me and began to dress herself, "Get out," She said quietly. "Steph I l-"
"Leave and don't ever come back, you clearly have something better than me to look at- even when you're in the middle of FUCKING ME!"
"You know that's not true," the extremities of contrasting emotion I was experiencing pushed me to the verge of tears too, and I felt a painful lump grow in my throat. She was already in her dress again, barefoot and cross-armed.
"Leave! Did you not hear me." The phone had stopped ringing now. I slipped on my briefs and jeans in a blur, my erection still plainly obvious through them. I heard her running upstairs as I looked down to zip up. I threw on the shirt without buttoning it, and dumped my shoes in the hallway on my way to find her. "STEVIE." I yelled, finding her bedroom door ajar. She lay on the bed, face in the pillow, sobbing. "Stevie?" I croaked, I hadn't seen her openly sad like this in years. She was exceptionally good at pretending she didn't care. I sat beside her and cautiously placed my hand on her upper back, stroking it reassuringly. "Please, just go Lindsey," She muffled. I moved her hair from the back of her neck and placed a small kiss there, "I love you angel." She said nothing back and I kissed the top of her head before leaving. I spent ten long minutes weeping into my steering wheel in her drive, completely exhausted with life. I tried to call her when I arrived back at my house. There was no response- as I expected. Later that evening I would be scorned by Charlotte for being in an awful mood for no apparent reason.