What We Are

Family Man

Earlier that day

I was stirring eggs in the pan, as Will gargled happily in his high-chair. I dreamt poignantly for a moment of how I had once been so child-like in ignorance, then I shook my head and continued talking to my best girlfriend, phone wedged between my shoulder and ear. "So as I was saying, he just left like that. No call, nothing, I have no idea where he is or when he's coming back."
"Did you try the number that asked for him again?"
"Yes, just the generic answer phone thingy-m-jig, but I could swear I've seen that number before!"
"Listen, thanks Kathy I'll just feed Will and I'll call you back."
"Sure thing, see you later Charlotte, I hope you feel better soon."
I hung up, and was about to place the now cooked eggs into two bowls-one small and plastic, one larger and ceramic- when I heard a key turn in the hallway.
"Lindsey!" I said fiercely as I stormed towards him. "Where the fuck have you been? What the fuck have you been doing?"
"Listen Charlotte I ca-"
"You have- no, WE have a SON, you can't just do as you please like you used to, it's been two years!"
"I was visiting a friend in hospital, it was serious."
"You couldn't have called?" I hissed. "You couldn't have wasted five seconds telling me this before you drove off?!"
"I wasn't thinking straight, I was just worried."
"Must've been a pretty special friend," I said as he followed me into the kitchen. It was best to leave it now, I had no intention of seeing him truly angry, and his story seemed legit- he was just a strange guy.
"Hello there," he said, kissing Will's head. "How's my favourite son?"
"Daddy!"
I smiled to myself as I plated the eggs, and then walked to place one on front of my son, the other on front of my husband.
"Thanks Charlotte, it looks great."
"They're just eggs Lindsey, I'm going to shower."
"Ok," he said, tucking into the food.

I let the hot water run over me for at least twenty minutes, during which time I thought a lot. Who was this friend of Lindsey's? He knew tonnes of people from the music business, some of them he was close with, but he wasn't the kind of guy who was everyone's best friend- most people seemed to think he was an asshole. I tried to think of people he wasn't related to that he had so much concern for. I rubbed shampoo into my hair. There were some of his friends from his high school and college days that I'd met before, one of them he mentioned he'd knew since kindergarten. However some of them lived hours away, and those that didn't he didn't speak to that often. Then there were his band mates. Chris had left for England though and he wouldn't tell me why exactly, though I suspected he wasn't exactly sure himself. There were Mick and John who he'd recalled occasional clashes with, but had generally praised, though they usually hung out in Hawaii. Then there was her. The woman who Lindsey seemed to have loved since he met her at sixteen, even after everything they had been through- but I had his child, she had no chance now. It was likely that he'd be affected by her having an accident, and also that he would try and brush the time he'd been spending with her under the carpet- especially after our big bust up over it in January, which we'd never mentioned again. I washed away the last of my shampoo with vigour and stepped out to dry myself. Did I really care if he'd been seeing Stevie? I wanted to but I knew our relationship was safe anyway, she was too independent, and he had a family to care for, and they were always fighting anyway- I had nothing to worry about.