"May we know more about that person? How were they like?" the interviewer asks me.
How was she like? As far as I can remember, she was the most precious thing in the world. Every room she stepped foot in immediately brightened up. In addition to the little smile from her, which caused butterflies in me, the way she slightly scrunched her face while doing so has up until this day never left my memory. And it's a good thing, because I don't ever want to get it out of my head.
Her voice made me get goosebumps. But the good kind of goosebumps that come with a warm feeling. She used to subconsciously let her pitch go higher whenever she was excited. I loved it when she came running to me as she called my name before throwing herself onto me from excitement of what she was going to tell me. I wish my eyes had cameras and recorded those moments so I could look at them at times like these where I'm not able to experience it again.
The way she always put everyone else's safety and happiness ahead of her own always left me in awe of her. She could have seemed childish and carefree at times, but whenever there was something serious going on, she completely changed. I remember when she carried Nayeon from practice all the way to her apartment because she had hurt her leg. Another time, she taught Mina how to swim because she wanted the younger one to be safe in emergencies that might require her to swim. She was an older sister to everyone, including the two girls who were older than her.
To me? I never thought that I deserve to say this, and I still don't think I do, but she is the owner of my heart, and the owner of the tattoo on my neck. My first and last love, my girlfriend. I didn't get the tattoo just because I'm so deeply in love with her, though. Rather, I got it because of something she used to do to me, which always made me surrender myself to her.
It often happens that I feel her touch even during nights I can't manage to fall sleep. The feeling of her lips brushing mine, then down along my jaw, and finally against my neck never failed to captivate me. That's why I decided to get her lips tattooed on my neck. And when I came home to show her, she made me fall in love with her again. She showered the spot with kisses for the entire night, making me fall asleep in such a dreamy way.
Another story of its own were her soft and gentle hands that put me at a loss of words. She was always so loving and caring with me. It was as if we were made for each other, since our hands fit perfectly in each other's. But her hands were around my waist most of the time, which I'm not complaining about at all. To be honest, it's only natural for me to still be daydreaming about her. But on the other hand, it's not the best idea to be zoned out during an interview, right?
"Ah, of course I can tell you about..." I get ready for the loud gasps and the increase of flashing cameras, "her."
Unfortunately, there's always a difficulty in every love story. It causes arguments, disappointment, and days where you don't talk to each other or even avoid eye contact. For us, the problem was who we were. No, I don't regret falling in love with her, but I regret breaking our promise. No one in their right mind would've even thought about breaking their word, but I did. The promise was so ugly and risky, something that was literally calling for trouble. Yet, I accidentally let my feelings take over and my mouth speak on its own.
It was during a VLive with Momo and I just spending time with the fans. We were eating food on the side and answering a bunch of questions they sent in the chat. Most of them were pretty common ones like asking about our favorite songs or what we are eating. Well, we wouldn't have managed to answer any new questions anyway due to how fast the comments were flooding down. However, there was one question that managed to catch my eye.
Momo and I were always aware of what we can show to the public and what we have to keep to ourselves. The closest we would get was little hugs here and there, but more than that was forbidden. It's not us who made these upsetting rules, but it was the company alongside the public. What's the difference between a man and a woman being in love and two women being in love?
