Who You Say I Am (A Jai Courtney Fanfic)

Chapter 91-Jai

*****I'm doing a double update today. Merry Christmas everyone! Also, sorry for the late posting. We've had a power outage tonight for about four hours, -30 *F wind chill but hopefully all is good now.*****

'Weary Traveler'—Jordan St. Cyr

Jai

As I drive away, I turn the radio on. A song starts and it's the one she was always changing the station on. I don't know the stations since they're not programmed in and she used the dial to change them so I leave it be. As I listen to the words, it really hits home at exactly what I'm going through now. It's oddly comforting but incredibly sad. I sigh and can't believe how much has changed in such a short time. I honestly don't know what to do with myself now. I came here following her, hoping for something I can't have now and I feel completely lost. I am a weary traveler.
I pull into the hotel and go straight up to my room with the book in hand. I set it on the lounge and take a seat looking for flights on my phone. I book a private flight back to LA from the local airport in the morning and then decide I'm going home so I book that one as well. I pack my bags and get ready to leave. I go to sleep feeling completely worn but I drift off easily.
I wake early in the morning getting ready for my day. I glance over to see that blue book with my things and I sigh that it wasn't a dream. She really doesn't want me. I've never felt so broken before. My chest aches. I pack up everything left and leave the room as if I was the ghost that was here. I check out and go to the car rental office. The salesman drives me to my flight and I thank him. I grab my water bottle I had left in there last night and realize it's frozen. I sigh. Ohio. I get my baggage ready and wait in the small lounge area for my flight. I'm actually impressed that this place is so compact yet convenient—the reception was right inside the door, there's a small lounge room, and the exit doors to the aeroplanes are just beyond that. They're ready in no time and we actually leave early. I'm served a decent brekky and it helps me to feel better... just a little bit. I actually feel like my life is ending. I already miss her so much. I feel like my heart is literally breaking. I feel so hollow and empty. I can't believe I finally fell in love and this happens. I guess that's why there's so many songs about heartbreak because it's so devastating and tragic.
I arrive in LA, taking a cab to my house. I unload all of my unnecessary things and pack up what I'll need back home. I only take a small bag, knowing I should have most everything I need at home. I get into the cab once more and we head back to the airport. I get on the long flight home, eating and then sleeping the vast majority of the time.
When I arrive, I go through the typical channels at the airport before I'm in another cab that drops me off at my house. I sigh glad to be here... yet not. I drop my bag and order some tucker getting it delivered. I eat and go to bed. I do this same routine for days...
I'm woken with a slap to my bum. I roll over and see my mum standing over me with her hands on her hips.
"Why is it that your cleaning lady is the one who tells me you're home and not you?" she asks me.
I yawn in response.
"She tells me you've been home for days," she says sitting down beside me. "What's going on? I figured you'd bring Megan for me to meet."
I sigh tossing my doona partly off of me and reach for a pillow to throw over my head.
"So... that's over then," she realizes sadly.
I don't need to say anything. She knows.
"Why don't you go out tonight with your mates? I told them you were home," she says.
"I could definitely use a few middies," I reply.
"Good. Make some plans. And put on some duds. I didn't realize you were in the nuddy," she says. "Oh, and come over when you're feeling better."
"Alright," I shout at her retreating form.
I lazily climb out of bed and take a shower. I look at myself in the mirror and decide I need a change. I trim and shave off the beard. I comb my hair realizing how long it's getting. I'll have to get it cut.
I sigh and get dressed. Next, I go through my carry on since I haven't touched it. I take out the blue Bible Mikey gave me and set it aside. I left the black one from Jamaica in LA. I put my duds away. Then, I check my phone. I see some messages from my mates. I respond to them and we're going out to a pub tonight. I see a message from Mikey.

Just checking in. How's everything?

I text him back saying it's aight. I oddly see one from Gale. I open it.

I'm really sorry things didn't work out. We'll all miss you on Wednesdays. Let us know if you're ever in the area. Always know you have friends here and we're praying for you.

I frown. I can't even respond to that. I already miss them all. But most of all, I miss her. I open my pictures and see the two of us together. I took that last one hours before I left. My heart aches as I go through them all. I still love her. I see an incoming call and get my hopes up that it's her... but then I see who it is and figure I better finish this.

"What do you want?"

"Why so upset? I figured you'd be done filming by now. Are you coming for a visit? My bed is cold."

"That's funny. I actually wrapped up early and came over. You already had someone there with you."

"I... I'm sorry you walked in on us. I thought you understood that we weren't exclusive."

"I must've misunderstood."

"Do you still want to continue?"

"Not at all. Should I get tested since apparently you're looser than I expected?"

"I only date clean guys."

"Good news for me. I guess this is goodbye," I say as I hang up.
I block her number just in case. I don't want anything else to do with her. The funny thing is... I actually only feel irritated with her. She's nothing like Megan. I've only just kissed her and she's the love of my life.