[✔] lightbulb » lee taeyong & na jaemin

ch. 47

brontide: the low rumble of distant thunder

» author's pov // weeks later »

it was late at night, when a loud ring from jaemin's phone woke him up. he looked at the clock. it was 1:27 am.

he saw that it was ara calling and picked up. the sounds of her sobbing immediately woke him up.

"taeyong..." she cried in a way he had never heard before, "he's gone."

taeyong had promised that he would kill himself if she broke up with him.

and he did.

jaemin began humming for her to calm down, but the pounding of her heart and the sobs escaping her made everything else in the world disappear.

——

» kwan ara's pov // hours before »

"SAVE HIM!" i screamed to the doctors. "PLEASE, PLEASE, PLEASE, SAVE HIM!"

the doctors continued to do whatever the hell they do when a person overdoses, but as minutes went by, and eventually, an hour, they paused to wipe the sweat from their face.

they turned around to face me. one of them cleared their throat.

"i'm sorry but..."

i screamed.

——

» author's pov // back to the present »

jaemin drove to the hospital as quickly as he could without getting into a car accident. because it was nighttime and only a rare few cars were on the road, he was above the speed limit the whole painful six minutes.

as he arrived and asked to see lee taeyong, he took a deep breath before entering the room.

ara was on the floor, weeping. his eyes flickered to taeyong, whose eyes were still wide open. he swallowed back the acid crawling up his throat. he pressed a cold hand to his forehead before going around the bed to taeyong's right side.

he closed taeyong's eyes for him.

"rest well, taeyong."

——

miyeon had arrived.

ara was sobbing, yelling, and pounding the floor as if she would open the gates of hell to have him back. miyeon was rubbing her back and whispering in her ear. jaemin knew that the only thing keeping miyeon this calm was prioritizing ara.

"oh..." ara cried, "it's all my fault."

"no," miyeon said firmly, "you were never the problem."

jaemin stood calm and collected as silent tears fell down his face. my old best friend, he thought. strangely, he didn't feel sad, but the tears begged to differ.

ara finally calmed down and fell into subconsciousness, passed out on the chair. miyeon stood and watched her for a while before coming forward to hold taeyong's hand.

she cried bitterly with a small spark of relief in her eyes.

——

» author's pov // one week later »

it was time for the funeral.

miyeon and ara stood side by side, holding hands as they waited for people to arrive at the door before entering themselves. they had ordered plenty of food, but as more time went by, they knew that nobody else would be coming except for only a handful.

they both took shallow breaths as they entered the room. they were met with taeyong's parents, ara's parents, and jaemin. nobody else had came, and this struck miyeon to think about how lonely taeyong truly was, even if he deserved it.

taeyong's parents were sobbing with regret for never doing anything sooner. as they slowly stopped crying, they began talking to ara's parents who were standing an awkward five feet apart from each other despite their divorce being years ago.

miyeon and ara were basically glued together, their hands sticky with sweat but none of the two caring. occasionally, miyeon would squeeze ara's hand to keep both her and ara grounded to reality. if she wasn't careful, she felt like she would fly away.

jaemin was behind them, and had not spoken a single word besides greeting them with a hug.

the mortician called out, saying that the casket would be shut soon so that they could begin the burial and that people should go take their final look. taeyong's parent went first, and after, ara's parents. jaemin went, and circled around to be with miyeon and ara after simply staring at taeyong's face.

miyeon and ara then went, and finally unclasped their hands.

ara held onto taeyong's hands as miyeon began talking to his lifeless body.

miyeon kissed his forehead, squeezing his other hand. "taeyong...i want to say i hate you. but when i see how our last moments were, i just want to say thank you. leaving korea forced me to clear my head. i hope you do better in the afterlife, or your next life, even if i have to say i don't think you deserve a happy one." she laughed bitterly.

it was now ara's turn. she shook as she held both of taeyong's hands. "why are you so cold, bubu? do you need me to warm them up? bubu, please answer me. please show me i didn't do this to you..." she was crying so hard that she could barely breathe. "i love you so much, even if you hurted me, even though you scarred me physically, mentally."

"please," she continued, "i can't survive with this guilt. i hate you for leaving me like this. what about our future...children, grandchildren..." she took big gasps of air. "i love you." and she kissed him on the forehead. when she lifted her head, taeyong's cheeks were wet with her tears. "please don't hate me for loving jaemin more..." she whispered that part quietly, so that only she would know those words were said. "why did you have to do this? i told you, find yourself first! you left this world because of me...i'm sorry...taeyong, i'm sorry you did this. i love you, still, even though i shouldn't."

jaemin gently pulled her away from the casket and wrapped his arms around her. jaemin pulled miyeon into the hug as well, and they trembled in each other's arms. he could tell his touch made her uncomfortable though, because she tensed up. he let her go and continued to comfort ara.

a voice interrupted their embrace.

"now time, for the burial."

ara fell to the ground on her knees, watching helplessly as they closed the casket. ara stared.

"bye, my first..."