Sliding Doors - 2 (English Version)

Chapter 7 - Josephine

Josephine

The idea of seeing him again, even if only through a screen, makes my stomach twist every time.
I know, I should just move on, move on.

After all he's put me through and how bad I've been over the past few months, it would be the least.
I'm trying, even though with the pandemic it's not easy trying to get back to my former life.
Mia is dragging me to every club possible with all the friends she knows here in L.A. and I must say I'm having a good time, even though I'm not really a social animal.
I'd much rather be on the couch watching movies on Netflix but after months of quarantine, getting out and seeing other people isn't so bad after all!

Interviews have been going on since this morning and I had to set my alarm for 5am to make sure I got there on time!
Mostly because the idea of seeing him again makes me nervous and I had to change the outfit I had chosen three times.
Luckily the technical part is taken care of by Mia, at least I have more time to get ready while she prepares the computer and connects to the various interviews.
I've lost count of the number of journalists we've seen today and Dylan doesn't miss a chance to make jokes, greatly relieving the tension that always builds between Hero and me.

I would gladly tell him that I can get over everything I would really like to tell him that nothing happened, but I can't!
I'm too proud to do that and I'm not sure I can handle all this distance between us.
We literally live on opposite sides of the world!!! It's ok for now: it has to be ok!

"You can't do that though eh..." Mia admonishes me with her gaze as I mute in a moment of pause.
I stretch my legs by going to the balcony with her!

"So what?"

"Come on Jo, you can tell from a mile that he's heart-eyed when you talk. He laughs when you laugh, it's obvious he's head over heels in love!"

"I don't care! He can make eyes at whomever he likes, as far as I'm concerned. I'm moving on!"

What a liar I am! I can't lie but I try, just to see if it works for once and I convince myself of this.

"You're not believable, you know that?" She smiles hugging me "But I'll pretend to believe you, like always."

I hold her tightly and try to calm my thoughts.

"I wonder how many girls he has in London. There's this Melissa from last night's video."

Mia showed me some photos and videos that Hero's friends have been posting lately.
I thankfully stay away from the social world, although the curiosity to know what he does is great!
There's always this girl in every video, beautiful of course, constantly hanging out with Hero.

"Not that I'm jealous eh..." I add breaking away from her and leaning against the balcony railing.

"No, indeed." She smiles shaking her head "You're not jealous!"

"Not at all!" I look at her crookedly "Really!"

"Yes, of course." She puts an arm on my shoulders "Whatever you say."

I sigh as I look at the horizon, trying to put my thoughts in order, though with little success.

I look at my watch, in ten minutes I have to be back online.
I took a break from the guys, though I can hear them chatting in the background from the computer I left in the living room.
I left with an excuse to avoid running into more talk that could be weird.
I don't like the tension between us but I don't know how to relax, I always have an unhappy joke ready to come out at the least opportune moment.
I really am a mess!!!

"You should talk to him." Sighs Mia "If you want to end things with him, just do it.Otherwise, it's not even right to keep him so at the mercy of events."

"I don't keep anyone at the mercy of events." I reply annoyed "If anything, I shouldn't talk to him at all! But I work together with him and I can't do otherwise."