Jai Brooks is my Hero

Step 1: baby,never cut.

"Open up abs" beau called
I opened my bedroom door and locked it behind me to make sure no one came in , I don't want them to know beau is helping me because as far as they're concerned I am fine and I don't want pity, other than Jai but I'm trusting he won't tell anyone.

"Firstly we need to figure out an alternative for cutting " he said pulling out papers.
"Beau you didn't have to do research just for me" I told him shaking my head .

" I did. I want you happy and also my little brother" he smiled. " now it says here that when you're doing it through anger you should smash something up but who doesn't do that anyway. Here it says instead of using a blade , use a marker pen, that way you aren't cutting but you're marking how you are feeling " he continued as I nodded " most importantly, talk to a friend. Example: beautiful beau brooks!!! " he laughed

I giggled along, " what if it doesn't have the same affect" I asked

" well there's more things here that don't sound as good but I'm gonna leave these papers with you so you can look through it. But stop cutting is only step 1, soon you won't need to cut " he smiled. He is so thoughtful.

" well me and Jai have gym, I'm making him go, he didn't want to, so I gotta go I'll text you, stay strong abs" he hugged me, I thanked him and said goodbye before he unlocked my door and left closing it behind him.

Wait why hasn't Luke gone.. I decided to go and see him, on the way out I decided to get an apple from the fridge, I reached into the fridge. "Ow, shit" I exclaimed in pain, I had caught my arm on an sharp, open food packets and it had pulled the scabs off one and abit of my cuts and caused me to bleed.

I cleaned up,before realising there wasn't even any damn apples in there. Maybe Luke has some.

I arrived at the brooks and knocked. "Hey" Luke said coming to the door and signalling me to come in.

"What brings you to my doorstep " he asked laughing. " boredom, curiosity and apples "

"Apples?" He asked with a 'wtf' look.

"Yeah, do you have any ? " I chuckled. " oh yeah haha wait there" he ran off to the kitchen while I sat on his sofa.

" here you go " he said walking in and tossing Me the apple,I caught it perfectly.

"Ah thanks, now just boredom and curiosity " i laughed " curiosity killed the Cat" Luke said laughing at the old saying. " so what you curious about "

" why didn't you go gym with the boys." I asked .

" oh , Jai is really upset about you two and beau made him go so I thought I'd give today a miss and let him talk to beau, telling two people about your problems is worse than one" he explained. He was also thoughtful, all three of them were.

" he's that upset?" I asked, the guilt rushed over me

" yeah he is, he didn't want to even get out of bed, Abs I don't want him to give up. What if he also starts to give up on life? " like was looking more and more upset by the second.

" i-um" I didn't know what to say. " but i didn't mean that in a horrible way towards you" he explained.

" I know I know. I'm sorry Luke" I sighed.

" give him a chance " Luke pleaded, little did he know that I was getting better for him.

" I've got to go Luke I will talk to you later, thanks for the apple" and before he could say anything else I got up and ran out.

Beau had given me a day to rest and then we started today so it had been two days and Jai was feeling this bad and I was now feeling guilty. I needed blades. Well my marker pen.

When I got home I found a felt tip pen and began. With everyline I drew I thought of the pain I caused Jai. It may not have the same effect as cutting but it will do.

Whilst marking myself I accidently drew over my open cut from earlier, it stung like bitch. The ink was all in it so I ran to the sink tryin my hardest to wash it but it stained my arm-.-

I tried my best and ended up giving up. I pulled my sleeve down and sat on the sofa watching pretty little liars. I needed to know who '-A' was..

I felt kinda funny half way through and my arm went kinda numb. Probably just from laying on it is what I told myself.

A/N

is it just from laying on it though Abbie?

Next chapter tells you what up

Xxx