Lola & Alex [Slow updates]

Chapter 22: "That's my eraser!"

LOLA'S POV

I slowly but steadily stood up from Alex's embrace, wiping my tears and snot. Feeling embarrassed suddenly, I swallowed twice not looking at him and went towards the bathroom, feeling his concerned gaze on my back.

I turned on the tap and splashed water twice on my face, washing it thoroughly before wiping it with a towel. I finally looked up at my reflection in the mirror above the sink and a single thought occurred in my mind.

I looked like an old hag.

Wisps of my blonde hair fell on my too pale face, the circles under my eyes at their darkest times just like me and there was a hollowness in my eyes with the still blotchy nose. My clothes stuck to me like a second skin, the bones becoming more and more prominent with each passing day with my actual skin becoming rougher and cracker due to the lack of nutrition in the past month.

Wasn't this what I wanted? A thinner body? Then why was I hating myself even more so now?

I looked so...lifeless. I wanted the previous version of me back, the one who could laugh without remembering that I was hurt badly. The one who could joke without thinking of the times when I used to do that with someone else. The one who was carefree and didn't give a fuck about other's opinion without remembering the reason why it happened to me.

I was fucking tired of being tired and helpless all the damn time.

The urge to cry once more washed over me, the overwhelming feelings did a little to help. It took all the energy in me to keep them at bay when I heard slow footsteps behind me.

Subconsciously, I placed both my hands beside the sink and closed my eyes when it became apparent that my tears weren't going to listen to me anymore. I took in a shaky breath and said in a low voice, "You should go."

I could practically feel his presence behind me when he spluttered, "W-what- no. Lola I-"

"You should go," I said once again with a newfound desperation, "S'il vous plaît." Please.

My voice broke at the end and I absolutely hated being so much vulnerable with him. I was scared he might use everything that I'd shown him today about my bare self without any filter in the future. I was sure that if got hurt even once more, this already very thin tether between me and my control over emotions would fully snap and I won't be able to take any more of life's bullshit.

Alex finally agreed after a few minutes and added in the end with much hesitation, "You can text me if you need anything."

I barely nodded and he finally left.

I had made only two steps when my body, my mind, my heart, my everything gave up and I sluggishly sat down on the bathroom tiles, my body leaning against the door with a hand placed on my mouth to stifle my sobs. Fresh tears pooled in my eyes and it didn't take long for me to become a sobbing mess a second time.

I hated how I still loved the person who never really loved me.

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"Hey! That's my eraser!" Five-year-old Lola scrunched her nose and angrily pointed towards the Olaf eraser sitting on the table of a dark blonde-haired baby.

Charlotte was sitting on the other side of her, peacefully doing her thumb-painting their teacher had asked them to do when she heard two screaming noises and looked up.

Lola and Alex were in a screaming match, both trying to get the eraser in their hands. The poor Olaf was stretching between them, wondering which maniac had brought him into such disastrous fate.

Lola shouted, "You shtole my eraser!"

Alex bared his teeth and made a growling sound, "I did nowt steal your eraser!"

Charlotte's eyes were widened and she watched them for five whole minutes while they shouted and fought for the eraser, the rest of the babies in the class also watching them.

She stood and went out of the class leaving her best friend and brother screaming at each other to search for Ms. Poppy who had said she was going to the washroom.

Thankfully, the teacher was making her way back towards the class and Charlotte ran the rest of the distance once she saw her, "Miss...miss...Lola and Alex fwighting!"

The teacher looked at her shocked and started to ask questions while they quickly returned to the class in time to see Lola stepping her foot on Alex's before punching him and finally raising her eraser high in air as though in victory.

Alex's hand was on his cheek and not even a minute later he started crying. Ms. Poppy quickly rushed towards them and said to Lola, "I saw what you did Lola!"

Lola looked at her soothing Alex with big blue eyes, her hair in two small pigtails and her lower lip quivered before she started crying too.

Charlotte had no idea what to do except follow the two when Ms. Poppy took the crying babies outside the classroom for a scolding lesson.

The memory was a blur and I had no idea how I remembered it. Perhaps, because that was the initial start of our hate for each other and my brain marked it as an important event. But whatever the case was, the random memory came to me with a tiny smile on my face in ages before sleep finally took over me.

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THATS WHY THEY HATE EACH OTHER LMFAO 

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