Beautiful Stillness ✔️

Chapter 29

Chapter 29

Ulysses has already been sobbing in silence for several hours. He has been sobbing nonstop since the store closed and he moved out with Teresa. Why wouldn't he? Lord Damond is getting engaged today; how could he not feel sad?

"Are you doing good, Uly?" Teresa asked and gave him another cloth to wipe his tears.

[I feel strange,] he said wiping his tears, [Even the night is about to cry.]

The clouds looks like it's gonna pour some heavy rain. Even the heaven is lamenting with his poor heart.

"You probably feel strange because the person you love is getting engaged tonight. It must hurt."

Ulysses's chest clenched, [Yes, it hurts. It hurts a lot...]

"Ulysses," Teresa tried to calm him down.

[It hurts, it hurts so much. I just want to die, it hurts...] Ulysses signed as his sobs became louder, [I can't breathe, I want him but be can't be mine.]

Teresa hugged the poor boy, "You can cry, go on."

And Ulysses did nothing but cry as he told Teresa his agony, [I love him, I love my master so much. So much it hurts. I can't bear to think that he's getting engaged to someone else. He'll marry someone else, he'll soon have his own family. Have his own kids. And I'll be forgotten.]

It genuinely aches. Why couldn't we just love without experiencing pain? Though he wishes him good life, it still hurts.

[When I'm with him, everything seems to be fine, but whenever we're away, everything goes wrong.] Ulysses signed as he breathes heavily, [Why does society criticize this kind of love? Don't you think that this is also love? Not just our social standing separates us this time; there are other factors as well. As well as us, it's also about those nearby. The fact that Lord Damond's bride is a man can possibly lead him to encounter difficulties. Consequently, he really can't be with me.]

Ulysses's world is falling apart, his chest feels really heavy as he tried to pour out his emotions, [Would the world accept us despite our social status if I were born a woman?]

"Ulysses..." Teresa cried, "Oh my dear, my poor beautiful boy."

[If I were born a girl, despite the fact that I'm poor and he's wealthy, would the society support and not condemn our relationship? How unfair. Some people have no trouble spending time with their loved ones. Some people experience difficulties in their personal situations. With some of the gender, while mine includes both.]

It's really true then, the saying; to fall in love is to carry a candle. At first, it makes the environment more uplifting. It hurts you when it starts to dissolve. Finally, it shuts out, making everything even darker, and all that's left is the burn.

[How am I capable of being this way? I'm deaf, a male, and the person I love is a man, too. And he can't even hear the words I'm dying to say to him. Neither he nor I hears what I'm trying to convey,] Ulysses bawled in pain, [Even though I am aware that he wouldn't hear me, I've always wanted to express my affection for him. I adore Lord Damond so much that I would return to him once more if he were to hug me right now. That I will still choose to be with him even if he hurts me often. That I'll chose to suffer even though I already know the implications of this arduous love in order to keep him. I'm constantly weak, so I don't understand how I could love this much.]