Chapter 15
"Sino sa tingin niyo ang pinakaguwapo sa magpipinsang del Allegre?" Vian suddenly asked.
Napasinghap agad sina Iri at Nova tapos ay nagpakawala ng matinis nilang tili. Sabay nilang binitawan ang hawak na baso at nangangarap na naglarawan sa kanilang diwa.
They looked stupid and I somewhat can relate.
"For me, it's Nazareth! I don't know, his appeal is something..." pangunguna na ni Vian.
"Duh, si Ashkelon kaya!" tutol naman agad ni Nova. "He's a bad boy in town!" She still looks so dreamy.
"Priam is so naughty, but for me he is the handsomest." nakangusong wika naman ni Kaira.
Nanatili lang akong tahimik habang nakikinig. I am too lazy to speak. But for me, I can say that it's Arridhaios. I don't know, I think I have fetish for cold guys. There is something with them I couldn't explain. Well, I heard that he's cold. Like really really cold and quite untameable. Compare to Sahil whom I think the coldness is discreet.
Sabay-sabay silang nagsilingunan sa akin. They're all raising their brows, asking for my opinion.
"Arridhaios..." walang gana kong wika.
They all squelch in excitement. Mukhang nakalimutan na ang iniinom na alak. Today is Sunday. I was so unproductive yesterday. I didn't do anything but to lay on my bed.
Naghihintay sa wala.
It's not a good thing that Kaira invited me to drink but I still came to her house. Wala rin naman akong magawa sa bahay. Still, I'm not being productive today. Nakatunganga lang ako sa kama ni Kaira. I told them that I'm not gonna drink for today. Buti nalang at hindi na nila ako pinilit.
Aren't they tired drinking and getting drunk? Parang nagsisimula na akong mapagod sa mga ginagawa nila. I am getting tired of myself too.
I am getting tired carrying the heavyweight in my chest.
Tumayo ako at naglakad patungo sa balkonahe ng kuwarto ni Kaira. It's already afternoon. The sun isn't blazing anymore. I can stay here until the sun sets. Wala rin naman akong maiambag sa kwentuhan nila, so I better stay here alone.
Isang maling desisyon na iniwanan ko ang aking phone. I just thought that I won't need it here.
I sat on the soft single sofa on the side. Pinamasdan ko sandali ang langit bago nalugmok sa pag-iisip tungkol sa lalaking dahilan ng pagkakagulo ng aking sistema.
Are we okay? Me and Sahil, are we still... friends?
I am not a stupid girl, but I think I'm close to being one. Bakit pa ako nagtatanong kung alam ko naman na ang sagot?
I came to their street again. Iyon ang naisip kong gawin nang magising ng maaga kanina. Nagbakasali akong makikita at makakausap ko siya. I did see him. He's with Reign again. They're talking seriously. Hindi ko na siya tinawag at umuwi nalang.
He called last night but he didn't talk. He's hesitating to tell me something. Iyon sana ang gusto kong itanong dahil masyado ng mabigat ang dinadala ko. I wanted to free my chest from those heavyweight. Gusto ko ng makahinga ng maluwag.
But I still like him despite of all. Panghahawakan ko parin ang desisyon ko. I know that it's right. It's right to gamble my heart to him. I don't want to repeat my mistake. I don't wanna quit. I don't want to give up my feelings for him.
I waited for the sunset. Hindi ko na alam kung ilang oras akong nakaupo at nakatulala lang sa kulay kahel na langit. Nang tuluyan ng dumilim ang paligid ay saka ako nagpasyang umuwi na.
