All Over You

Paranoia

Midweek was much more challenging than I thought it would be when Liam disappears to go filming. I don't bother dressing up in the morning, under the impression that I won't be seeing him today, so there's really no need to be glamorous. He's the only one I want to impress. I throw on a pair of black dress trousers and a blue t-shirt. It will do. I barely apply makeup and scrape my hair back into a messy bun. I should've washed it the night prior as it's slightly greasy at this point. I try my best to be one of those girls who can rock a quick bun, looking effortless when they throw their hair up. Unfortunately my hair was much messier than it should have been and it takes me a few attempts before I give up completely. 

I pull up in my usual parking spot next to Keira's. Her space is empty so I figure she must be getting the train to the broadcast. A pang of jealousy hits me that she gets this cool opportunity, but I remind myself that she is rightfully head of department and I have had many work opportunities of late. Though that isn't the soul reason of my jealousy. 

I brush it off and shut my car door, glancing around the lot. I notice Liam's blue car parked a few spaces down and wonder to myself why he drove here.

The day drags on and my mind jumps from place to place. I work to distract myself from thoughts of Jenifer and Liam but every time I forget, the painful reminder stings me from the forefront of my brain. He is spending the day with her. Not me. Sure, its work and that's just how things end up sometimes, but it doesn't offer me much reassurance. With Keira being gone too, I have much less distraction. Instead I bombard her with text messages about what's occurring, subtly hinting to her that I want details about Liam. I must be less subtle than I thought because she stops responding as the hours go by, only adding to my anxiety. 

Lunch rolls around and I have barely achieved anything. It feels strange going for transmission without Keira. I was considering asking Geoff to lunch with me, but he is in a meeting when I leave. I consider this may be a blessing in disguise. Being around Geoff usually means you have to be around Hayley and I am not tolerant enough to deal with that today. 

Instead, I head down to the cafeteria and grab a plain sandwich with a bottle of water. I sit at a small table in the corner and scroll through my phone, praying for something to take my mind off the thoughts filling my head. No matter how hard I try, nothing seems to distract me from the haunting daydreams. I imagine his hands snaking around her waist as she fiddles with something and he chuckles at her, removing the item from her to free her hands which she wraps around his neck...

I pull myself out of my horrific thoughts and glance down at my half eaten sandwich. I'm not sure why, but I can't seem to find an appetite today. I know I should trust Liam, but he does have a past. He has a past with her. No one knowing about Liam and I just adds to the paranoia which settles heavily on my chest.  Frustratedly, I give up with lunch and head back to the studios for transmission, making smalltalk with Geoff and frantically checking my phone for updates from Keira. The clock ticks on. Still nothing. This day is dragging like nothing I've ever experienced before. 

                                                             ______________________

"Oh, Tiffany, I forgot to mention I'll be leaving early tonight." Geoff interrupts my worried thoughts as we de-rig the studio. 

I unlatch my teeth from the nail they were nibbling on to respond.

"Any exciting plans?" I ask, forcing as much false enthusiasm into my voice as possible.

"A little dinner date with Hayley up London, today was the only slot they had available."

"It must be a very expensive place."

"Unfortunately for my bank account, yes. It's The Shard's dining facilities." He informs me.