Con Brio: Todd and Ian's story

49) Ian

Ian can't believe it, but it's true, because the applause comes and he gets up with the others automatically. 
He's done it. He's actually done it. He breaks out in a wide smile as it hits him. 
It went... well. Right? It went well? He bows again with the rest and follows them offstage. 
"That was fucking awesome." Todd says. "I don't think we ever played it better. And you, Eddy! You were on fire, man. Way to lead."
"You all were great." Eddy replies with rosy cheeks. "Ian! I loved your lines so much!"
Ian's heart flutters at the compliment.
"Thanks, Eddy." is all he can think to say. 
He's feeling... good. There is no other way to describe it. Normally, after a panic attack, the day drags and drags, and he feels like he's walking through wallpaper paste. But not today, somehow. In fact he feels refreshed, ready even to meet the orchestra and the dreaded concert master. 
He's going to be there with Todd on his arm. The biggest catch in the world. Who is going to get to him now?

She bounds towards them the second they make it into the large rehearsal and something inside Ian wants to cringe. 
But no. No more. He needs to get his shit together on this. I mean, come on. How many years has it been since she rejected him? She's probably forgotten all about it. How long is he going to let that drag him down for, give her power over him she's never even asked for? 
The girl didn't like him. Tough. Todd does. 
By some miracle Todd does. 
So he smiles and steps forward with his hand outstretched. She looks up at him in surprise. 
"The orchestra sounded great, Anna." he says calmly. "Way to lead. I'm sure they'll miss you next year."
Her eyelids flutter once, twice, and he knows instantly that she's not forgotten a thing. But then she smiles. 
"Thanks, Ian. You sounded so good! I love that viola part, and you played it really well."
"Thank you."
She smiles sweetly. 
"I'm going to get a coke. You want one?"
"Sure, thanks."
"Todd, you too?"
"Yes, thanks, Anna."

See? That's how easy it can be. He could cry with the realisation. She doesn't hate him, does she? Has she been feeling awkward too? She doesn't seem to now though, as she comes back with drinks and chats and banters with them all. 
Not even just with Eddy. 
He holds Todd's hand and intertwines their fingers. 
His rock. His lucky charm. His everything. His heart swells with the love he feels for him. Next to Todd he can deal with anything. 
When has he last enjoyed  a party with people he doesn't know? 

It's after midnight by the time they're walking back and he knows Todd is ready to be alone. And he thinks it's not to sleep. He hopes it's not to sleep. He could feel Todd reacting to him, earlier in the concrete hall. Is that what he's about to get, in the privacy of their room? 
"So, beauty sleep?" Todd jokes to Eddy, and he has to grin. This again? Every time? 
But it's hilarious, of course. It gets more hilarious as Eddy makes googly eyes at Brett. 
"Hm. Don't know. We've got all day tomorrow to sleep, right?" he says, and they all laugh. 
Is it the atmosphere? Is it the concert they've just had, the high that seems to have washed over all of them? Ian has no idea, but he knows he wants nothing more in the world than to be there already, to close that door behind them and finally take his love into his arms.