Con Brio: Todd and Ian's story

39) Ian

Ian blinks against the light of the single lamp on the ceiling
Whoa. 
He can't believe what's just happened, he can't believe they did that, he did that, and he can't believe that Todd came like that. He could feel him coming in fact, pulsing inside himself. It was the strangest, but most wonderful feeling. 
Yeah, it was sore when Todd went in. And he thinks Todd knows, because of what he commented. Or maybe because of his earlier experiences, Ian doesn't know. 
How can he tell him that he loved it, and make Todd believe him? 
Todd's eyes have opened again, and they are regarding him soberly, the orbs a clear question. And Ian knows what to do now. The only thing to do will be honesty. Todd will accept nothing less.
"Are you okay?" Todd asks him hoarsely. 
"Yes." he says definitively. "More than okay, Toddy."
"I hurt you."
"Only a little bit. I guess I... have to get used to it? It's what I get for having a boyfriend with a big dick, right? I loved it though."
"Why?" Todd asks, ignoring most of the sentence and going straight for the end bit. Ian scrunches his eyebrows together. 
"Why do I love anything? I love being yours. And that feeling, wow. With your fingers? That was... wow."
Todd smiles. 
"Yeah. So... it wasn't a bad experience?"
"No!"

Something clicks in Ian's brain then and he comments before he can apply a filter.
"Toddy... is... is that why you don't like bottoming? Something happened?"
Todd stills and pales, and Ian can see the shutters in his face closing like a switch has been flipped. 
"Never mind about that, baby." he says in his best beach boy tone. "I'm all good if you're good."
God, how Ian wants to press him, because he wants to know so badly why the shutters, but he knows better than to ask again when Todd is like this. So instead he nods slowly. 
"I'm very good. It... it's true, right, I'll get used to it?"
"Yes. I... at home I have some toys that will help. If... if you're up for that."
Toys.
Toys, like what?
"I'm up for anything." he says with a shy grin. "And... well, you can do the thing with the fingers any day."
That does it, Todd smiles, his eyes smile along and the shutters open again, just a little bit. 
"Good."
Ian waits for just a second, just to see if the coast is clear. But something inside him presses up and he can't press it back down. Something's happened to Todd, he's sure of it, something he's never told him. 
Why? 
And what can he do to help?
"Do you... do you like that?" he asks, stepping carefully around the real question. Todd's eyebrows raise and he seems to think for a second. 
"What, being fingered?"
"Yeah."
Todd shrugs. 
"I don't really know, that's not happened often. But with you... if you want to try at some point, I'm game."
Ian nods. He doesn't really know what to say now, and to be honest he really has no idea how to proceed anyway, but he guesses at the very least he'll have to give Todd some time to get his own thoughts together. So he stretches out softly, wincing a little at the unfamiliar feeling down below, and puts his arm around Todd. 
Having Todd in his arms is the best thing in the world. He kisses him gently, just above the brow. 
"You should get some sleep."
"So should you."
"Yeah. I'm just going to have a quick shower, okay?"
"Of course."

He gets up gingerly and quickly heads into the bathroom. The quicker he showers, the quicker he's back with Todd, back in his arms.