Con Brio: Todd and Ian's story

58

He's nervous, progressively more nervous as they get closer to home. He's even ignored the glance of the Panini girl completely, because he wants out, he wants home. Even if he's not sure what he's facing there. 
What will Ian want? He's thought about asking him on the plane but after everything that happened and after already having been so weak he just didn't have it in him. He smiles at Brett's dad, who is parked at the kiss and ride to take them back to the apartment. 
Shit, does he have to be careful around them, actually? Will Eddy and Brett have to talk to their homophobic parents about their relationship? He shakes his head without movement and lifts his cello into the large boot. 
Maybe just be on the safe side. He doesn't want to do anything to make it harder for those boys. 

By the time the street looms he's so nervous he can barely breathe. Still he manages to thank Brett's dad politely. They're real big on politeness, he knows. So he bows his head slightly and smiles demurely. 
The house seems big and empty. There have been no notes here for a week, no laughs, and last time they were here he felt as empty as the house feels now. He was single, and pining. 
What a difference a week makes. He turns on the lights as he walks through the living room and into the bedroom to put his luggage and cello down. How is he going to bring this? Does he need to wait for Ian to say something? 
But what if Ian does the same? 
God, how he wishes he could read his mind, just for a moment, so he'd know what he wants, so that he won't pressure him either way. He turns around to walk back out and almost bumps into Ian. 
"Oh!" he exclaims. Ian smiles.  
"Hi."
He stands across from him in silence, rooted to the spot, the moment growing and growing until it takes on monstrous proportions and looms around them. This never happens, but he is lost for words. 
But then Ian breaks it, because he smiles again, and the moment shatters and flies away into nothing. 
"What did you mean with the bedroom?"
For a second he can do nothing but stare, then he lets his tongue take over and do the work for him. 
"I meant... I don't know what you'd like. Where... you know... you would like to sleep. Um. Sometimes. Or all the time. I don't know."
Something relaxes in Ian's face he hadn't realised was taut and he steps forward, puts his hand on Todd's chest. His eyebrows raise.
"Your heart is going so fast."
Todd nods. 
"I'm nervous."
Now Ian's eyebrows head for the ceiling. 
"You're nervous?"
"You sound surprised." A smile appears around Todd's lips, and his heart starts slowing a little.
"Yeah. Sorry. It's just... you're so strong. It's easy to assume you don't get nervous."
Todd nods as his hand goes up to envelop Ian's. 
"Not around you, my love. What I feel for you... it's scary. What if you don't feel the same. I have no idea what I'd do."
Ian nods too. 
"Never gonna happen, Toddy. So... do you mean you'd like me to sleep here? Sometimes?"
Todd takes a deep, releaved breath.
"Or all the time. You know. What you want."
The smile on Ian's face is like breaking sun through rainy clouds. 
"I want to be by your side always. So yes, please. All the time."

Something lifts in Todd and he's suddenly swallowing back tears. 
"Good." he whispers, overcome with the emotion of it all. 
"Yeah. Good." Ian whispers back.