The Inferno's Indulgence

Chapt 30

Xyle

You're finally going to see just how desperate and submissive I am for you.

I tell you as many times as I can how fucking gorgeous you look. This is different. You are different. Before today, I've never witnessed anyone wear something like this. Your pale blue dress and your dark black converses felt like an odd combination when you started to get dressed, but as you walked by me, swaying your hips and turning around to tell me you were ready to go, I began to fall in love with the outfit as I've fallen in love with you.

You are far different than anything I've ever had. Anything I have ever wanted. My past doesn't exist when I'm around you and my fears and tribulations don't, either.

As you stand between the two tall shelves inside of the bookstore you had no clue about before I told you, I watch how your brown irises glimmer with adornment. I was a bit nervous to show you what I've worked so hard on, so I hoped that you would love this place. Your brown irises seem to grow thinner as your pupils dilate to become bigger. Your eyes doe like and filled with love. Because that's what you are, Celeste. Love.

I never knew seeing you surrounded by a thousand books would make you look so radiant. The fixed frown set on your face the day before has completely vanished. Those beautiful pouting lips aren't poked out anymore and begging to be kissed when you don't want to be. Instead, your plump lips begin to form into a thin line as the whites of your not so perfect teeth show, letting me know that you are as happy as always. You don't even know what you're doing to me, what you've been doing to me for the past few months. I never believed in love. I have been hurt many times before and after growing up in a household where one person clearly loved the other with all their heart and the other one didn't give a shit, it was hard for me to even try. I mean, who wouldn't love their partner with everything in them? Especially when you've built a life around them, bared a child, been together for years. I am still so fucking confused and trying to understand why there wasn't a happy ending for her, but for me and you, I don't worry at all.

You called me Darling. It was the first time a woman has ever called me darling. But I guess you can say today is a few firsts for the both of us. You called me darling, and I completely stopped worrying.

I overthink as much as you do, baby, but I try not to show it. I dropped my cup of ice cream and it spilled all over the fresh floors, spilling its milk and cookies all over and getting a bit on my shoes. You were there to witness this. I almost grew frustrated, feeling as if this ice cream dropping was going to keep me away from enjoying another moment with you like the one in the car, and you could tell. You could always tell when there was something wrong with me. You felt my energy. You lifted your hand to my face and ran the soft pad of your thumb across the stubble. "Don't worry, Darling. I carry wipes in my tote. Second advantage to having such a large bag". You told me not to worry. My burning energy seemed to release itself, and I calmed completely. I watched as you pulled that bag open and pulled out a tiny, enclosed bag. You pulled a few wipes from it and handed them to me to clean up my mess. Even now I'm still smiling. I should have asked you what the first advantage to having such a large tote was, but I didn't, because I didn't worry.

I'd opened a window to let a bit of the sun shine in earlier today. And as you stand by it now, your brown skin illuminated with the evening sky, the wind begins to take over you. It makes those thick, black curls sway about as perfect as you sway those hips when you walk. You look like an Angel.

I appreciate everything about you, maybe I should tell you that more. I appreciate your stubbornness. I appreciate your shyness. I appreciate your cooking. I appreciate the way you feel as though you have to explain every little thing. I appreciate the way you allow me to be what I've found to be, my true self. I appreciate the way you can feel my energy. I appreciate your sensitivness. I appreciate the way you allow me to talk as much as I can about my mother. I appreciate the way you've made me fall in love with you. You're a beautiful soul. I want my soul to intertwine yours forever.