The Brainy Rebel

TBR 50

Maxine's POV

"I shouldn't have forced myself to come with you." Pagbasag nito sa katahimikan. "Though I deserved that. At least I got what's due."

"Stop talking."

I heard him laugh a little. Of course I'd do. Napakatahimik ng tinatambayan namin. "I'm a blessed jerk to have accompanied you today, you know."

We both kept mum. I do agree with what he said. He is a jerk. And yes, I let him come with me. Hindi nga lang sa bahay, dahil alam kong mag-aalma si Margaret kapag ginawa ko 'yun. About my mom, well, though she never left my side during the hard times, she never said anything foul against Nathaniel. And she's friends with Tita Anne.

I breathed in. "Nathaniel, to answer Glenn's question earlier... it's because I still love you."

"After everything?"

"After everything."

He did not say anything after I said that. Nang lingunin ko ito ay umiiyak siya. It took him minutes to speak up. "What did I do to deserve your love?"

"I don't know. We don't know. Hindi pa naman ako sigurado."

He chuckled and I kind of felt relieved after hearing it. Mahal ko pa talaga. "Would you listen if I share a memory?" I just nodded, making him continue. "It was the day before our third anniversary."

"The one you forgot?" Imik ko bago pa maisip ang magiging epekto nito. When I realized what I just said, I immediately took it back. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean it like that. I wasn't thinking."

"Tama ka naman don." He laughed before continuing. "I was strolling for baby clothes in the mall because I just learnt that my sister was pregnant. Napadaan ako sa isang jewelry store tapos sumakto 'yung tingin ko sa isang singsing. It was a simple silver band with some diamonds- I didn't find it beautiful. Until I checked my phone, got a glance of my wallpaper, your picture, and I saw you wearing it. Ang ganda pala."

"You had it with you since then?"

"Yes, I was planning to ask you something when I come back." He looked at me as I looked at him. "If I did not miss the chance."

I breathed in and out before fishing for my necklace. Dangling upon it, hiding within my neckline, was the ring he was talking about. "This one?"

He looked extra-shocked, extra-hopeful, extra-pained. "You kept it?"

"I kept it safe. It was my only medium for holding on." Binitawan ko iyon at hinayaang nakalabas na ngayon. "Three years, Nathaniel... Paano mo 'ko natiis?"

"Mahal kita at ayokong makita mo ang sarili mong nagmamahal ng isang palya, ng isang taong kumawala sa mga opotunidad."

"And you think leaving me like that will save me from the pain?"

"I thought I'd still have you when I come back. I took you for granted." He sniffed and wiped the tears away. "You became my constant, Maxine. Hindi ko naalalang hindi lang pala ako 'yung may mga pangarap."

"That sounded like an excuse." I said hurtfully.

"'Yun lang 'yung meron ako. 'Yun lang 'yung maibibigay kong rason."

"I wish I knew." I whispered. "Para naintindihan ko sana."

Tumingin ito sa lapida ng tatay ko. "I'm sorry I did that, sir. I became preoccupied with the fact that I had to prove myself to you, her family that I forgot about her, the reason why I was doing everything in the first place."