Meph: Please don't fear that you are upsetting me.
Sir, I barely know you're there.
In: Sorry, were you talking? It's hard to see.
Like a stench that lingers in the air.
Meph: Trying to be clever? That makes no sense.
That's a role you haven't earned.
Both: You don't even see your insignificance.
Well, I think it's time you learned!
Both: You may think you're bad, but Mister, I am badder!
Honestly, man, where's the thrill in~
Being such—
In: —A has-been—
Meph: —A wanna-be—
Both: —Villain?!
Meph: You're a garden snake and I'm a big, buff, adder.
Both: Face it, I am way more badder~~~
Than you!!
In: Surely you can see it's ridiculous,
Two villains in one fairytale?
Meph: This town isn't big enough for both of us,
Both: So off into the sunset you should sail!
Meph: I can send my minions to help you pack.
In: I'll be careful not to grow.
Both: Buddy, I will miss you,
Meph: Alas.
In: Alas.
Both: But you have gotta go!!!!!!!
Both: You can claim you're bad, but I'm a better badder!
Meph: Nothing you've got up your sleeve will~
Ever equal me as the master of evil!!
In: I'm the heart and brains and you are just the bladder.
Both: How can you believe you're badder~~~~
Than I?!
Both: Nobody ever would bother to tell,
A tale of Don Jonathan and of Claudius!
Meph: My quills are much sharper,
In: My hair's much more high,
Meph: So jump down a rabbit hole!
In: Go climb a dreamstalk!
Both: IT'S NOT AU REVOIR BUT GOODBYE!!!!!!!!!!!!
(Intermission)
Both: Someone really should put a stop to him!
Up to me to find a way!
In: Maybe there's a house I could drop on him?
Meph: Is a poison apple too cliche? ( Yes!)
In: Drag him to a rooftop and throw him down!
Meph: A spell to make him disappear!
Both: Once that d!ck is gone, I will rule the world,
And everyone will cheer!!!!
Both: He was kinda bad, but I am so much badder!
Clearly that is why I have to~
See that he lives happily never after!!
Once I sit alone atop the villain ladder,
Everybody in Mobius~
Will totally be in my thrall!
They will say "My Lord we praise ya!"
Because I'll be not just badder!
Badder! Badder!
Meph: But the nasty,
In: Flabbergast-y,
Both: Everlast-y,
Very very baddest of them all!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
