Humor Me (Steve Rogers fanfiction)

Chapter 11

While Steve and Bucky are on their mission the next day, I decide to spend my time in the gym. I need to punch someone, but the sand bag will do too.

So after I finished my breakfast with Sam I make my way to the training room.

„Don't you hurt yourself." Sam yells after me. I push out air through my nose. I hope I hurt myself. Rogers' betrayal will hurt less then. I don't really know what I expected from him but it definitely wasn't this.

I know we've been getting on each others' nerves a lot but after I told him about my parents I was really expecting him to be a little more cooperative. After all he literally pushed information out of me that I didn't even want to give him and then uses it against me. Coward.

After I put my fists into bandages I begin punching. I put all my power into it. All of my power, anger and...sorrow.

Images flash before my eyes. I see two people. My parents. And I see a lot of men in suits. They are dragging them away from me. I am screaming.

„MOM! DAD!" I scream.

„It's going to be okay honey! We will be back soon! We will find you! Just go to your aunt Karen's she will..." my dad is silenced by a punch into his stomach. He bents forward and caughs. I can see the pain in his face when he looks back up at me.

„Stop it!" I scream and run towards him. But someone much taller than me grabs me by the waist and lifts me up. I start kicking and screaming, but I can't win against the person holding me back. So eventually I stop.

I see my parents being thrown in the back of a small truck.

„No." My voice is almost gone now. My eyes find my mom's. They are full of pain. My heart shatters into a million pieces.

„I love you forever." she mouths to me right before the doors of the truck close. I try to scream again but nothing comes out. My throat is dry. My face is wet from all my tears.

The man that's been holding me let's go of me and I fall to the ground. My knee ribs open but I don't feel it. My heart is the only thing I can feel. Shivers and sobs shake my body. It's only like 34 degrees (3°C) outside and I am only wearing my thin nightgown.

We've been ambushed in the middle of the night.

It's January 13th 2007.

„Do yourself and your parents a favor: Don't come looking for them." The man says and turns away from me. I can't answer. He's already a few feet away from me when he turns to look at me again. „Hail Hydra." He says and then disappears.

Punch after punch my fists land on the hard leather of the sandbag. Only when I feel a tickle on my nose I realize that I am crying. I whipe my bandaged hand over my face and continue.

I have been able to keep those emotions down for the past 15 years. But since Rogers made me confess to him they have been coming up all the time.

Fury bubbles up inside of me. He had no right to make me say it. He had no right to force me into admiting anything about my past. It is not his business. I have been dealing with my past on my own for forever. And he doesn't even know the half of it.

An image flashes before my eyes and my stomach turns. I stop punching and run to the toilet. I drop to my knees and throw up my breakfast. All of it. My body is shaking. I throw up until nothing's left.

The images eventually stop circling my head but the twisted feeling stays. I sit down next to the toilet and lay my head back against the wall. My breathing is still moving fast and so is my heart. I can feel a layer of sweat on my forehead. Holy shit.

I sit here for a while, trying to let my mind drift to literally anything else. But it's not working. I haven't thought about my past like this for a few years now. I've always found some way to distract myself from it. That's probably why my body reacted the way it just did.

I need to get up, I need to get moving. I flush the toilet and pull myself to my feet. I'm still very shaky, so I begin to losen my bandages around my hands. That's probably it for training today.

After I collected my things I go to the kitchen to get a glass of water. I take small sips, leaning against the countertop, still trying to stop my heart from jumping out of my chest.

„There you are." I jump at the sound of Steve's voice and it takes my eyes a second to focus on him.

„Captain fancy pants." I growl. „Nice suit." He's wearing one of his older ones, which makes him look like a real life action figure. It also highlights his ass perfectly to be honest.

„We're back with the nicknames?" he doesn't seem amused. Perfect. Neither am I. There's no need to try and stop my heart from speeding now. The fury that builds up inside of me is way too powerful. I take a few steps closer to him. Smirking. My hand grabs his shoulder playfully.

„Back?" I let out a little laugh. „They never left, honey." The way he pushes away my arm immediately tells me my tactics are working. He's triggered. Good.

„You need to back off Ivy." he raises his voice. I feel my stomach flutter. He looks so pissed. Damn.

„Oh, she's feisty." my grin deepens. Rogers takes one step closer. He looks dead serious. His eyes are full of despise. Why do I like this so much?

„I originally came to apologise." He says. I cross my arms and lift my chin. My smile is gone.

„Appropriate. Continue." I challenge him. He should be apoligising.

„I said originally." Is all he responds. I can't stop my jaw from dropping a little.

„So I call you one name out of fury, which you caused by the way and you decide not to apologise for taking my only chance of finding my fucking parents??" I bite my tonge for a second to keep from screeming any louder. Rogers just looks at me in disbelief. He is in disbelief? „You're even weaker than I thought, Rogers." I say quietly.

„You're the one constantly insulting me." Oh boohoo! Big baby. I bite my lip to hide my upcoming smirk.

„I can't help it, it's so easy." I say as if struggling. I see his eyes on my lip that I'm biting. So I look at his. They're a tat open. His breath tickles my nose. After a second he finds his voice again.

„Cut the bullshit or I swear to god I will..." I can't let him finish.

„Will what?" I ask in a tone so innocent I almost believe myself. „Kill me?" A smirk finds my face again. I look at his lips again. He's breathing heavily. „Or take me right on this table, Rogers?"

When I look back up his eyes seem to be a little darker than before. He closes his mouth and swallows. He probably doesn't think I saw it but I did. Looks like an inner fight I would just be too happy to be a part of.

As I think about what I just said, my stomach flutters again. Him taking me on this table? That would be...

„YO CAP!" We both jump and turn to the direction Sam's voice sounded from. „We need you!"

Steve turns to me for one last second. If I wouldn't know it better I'd say he looks sorry that he has to go. His eyes look my face up and down. Then he pulls his look away from me and disappeares from the kitchen without saying another word.

As soon as he's gone I grab the countertop so I don't fall. What the hell just happened?