Better off dead

Better off dead chapter 15

Gerard's POV

'Holy shit! I'm such a bad person! How could I ever even think like that! He kisses me twice and I think there's a remote possibility that he'll want to be turned into a vampire! What the hell was I thinking, thinking like that? Fuck man, he might wanna stay with me, he even might wanna date at one point, but that doesn't fucking mean he wants to be a bloodsucking parasite!' My mind came to the realisation of what I was actually thinking about moments after we broke the kiss.

"Do you... uh maybe wanna get changed?" Frank grinned, looking slightly amused and sickened by what I was wearing.

'Oh right, I still have the whole your blood stained clothes look going on don't I?'

"Oh yeah, do you want to borrow some clothes? You know until we can go get your stuff?" I smiled, standing up and cracking my back.

"Yeah thanks, who said I'm gonna live here?" He joked, gesturing to the abundance of living space around us as he laughed.

"Recall? About five minutes back." I laughed, reaching out to pull frank up from the sofa.

Almost as if it had been planned we burst out into small giggles at out rambling topic of conversation.

"You're and idiot you know?" I laughed holding out my hand and pulling at franks arm.

Suddenly, frank retracted his arm in a painful hiss and held it to his chest, clenching it tightly.

"Oh shit are you o-" I said pulling up frank from the waist, so he was standing, and was cut off sharply.

"I'm fine, it's nothing!" Frank almost stuttered.

I could hear it again, the pain in his voice. Similar to in the alley, it was dry and raspy but laced with hurt and the burning sensation of holding back tears. I was despicable, every time I tried to help him I hurt him.

I don't know why I asked if he was okay, I already knew he wasn't, remember? I knew he had problems from the start, but ill say it again, I need him to admit them himself. I still just wanna grab him and tell him it will be all okay and that he doesn't have to bottle anything up from me because I know but I can't do that to him. I can't make him feel like even his biggest secret was known.

It's not a good feeling.

I had seen this before, the retracting wrist. I also already knew about it before now but for some reason, right now, I couldn't bring myself to admit it. He was so strong, how could he do this. I knew that he did it but I could not fathom why.

'He cuts...' my mind drown in a sea of thoughts.

'He needs to admit it to you gerard, don't forget that...' Was all I picked up from the mass of thoughts.

"Let's get changed then!" I half cheered, ignoring what knew about him and killing off my thoughts that were poisoning my mind.

"Okay." He smiled, following me into the bedroom where I kept my clothes.

'He's okay gerard, I'm sure there's a perfectly justifiable reason he does this!' I thought, grinning nervously.

I knew there's never a justifiable reason for this, but like I said, I just can't admit it to myself. Frank is not broken.

All I want to do is grab him and tell him he will be okay. If only he would let me change him then this would all be over and I could fix him, all our problems. I knew it.

"Here put on these, you can get changed in here if you want, I'll go in the bathroom." I smiled handing him some similar sized clothes and walking out of the room.

I wasn't exactly gonna force him to get changed in the same room as me was I?

After getting dressed I had finally ignored my thoughts and decided to obviously make the best decision possible right now, I was gonna ask him why he cut.

After all, both of us can't be broken, relationships just won't work like that...

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Hey guys! I don't usually leave authors notes but I guess here's one.

If this story is lacking smut for you so far (don't worry there will be some in the near future) you can check out my other short stories on here, I uploaded the first one its only three chapters long and is basically word porn with plot, but as undignified as that sounds it was wrote with dignity and is not a short piece of quick smutty rubbish! I'm not trying to get views on my story I'm just saying if you like this story and the way it's wrote and you want smut there is some coming and there is a brief taster of what it will be like on my other story.

Warning: it is a daddy kink story, called happy birthday frankie, but that's a one off and better off dead is not daddy kink.