Niragi X Reader X Chishiya

Chapter 14

//Niragi POV
//

As soon as my fist hit Chishiyas face I knew I won't be hearing from him for a while. Sure it would be easy to kill him but I don't want y/n to hate me more than she does now. For some reason she cares for him. All I do is mess things up. I need her. She makes me want to be a better person but it seems I'm just cursed.

I know exactly where she will be hiding, I can read her like a book. It won't be somewhere secret, or even safe. I'm going to find her and I'm never letting her go again.
I begin walking down the stairs, thinking of what to say to her when I find her. Will she scream? Is she scared of me? Sure I shot her, but I want to prove I can take care of her, make her better. Is it true what people say? Am I crazy?

I exit the main building and begin slowly approaching where I saw her kissing Chishiya. I feel my fists clenched thinking about it. Why would she do that to me? Does he make her feel safe?

I stand behind a wall and poke my head around the corner, keeping myself hidden in the darkness.
Exactly what I thought. I can see her sat next to the wall with her head in her knees. Is she crying?
I want to hold her and make her feel better, I know she will just push me away. How do I recover our relationship after I've shot her? Maybe I am crazy.

I just stand and watch her for a bit, trying to gather some confidence. She doesn't seem to move. I creep up to her making sure not to make a noise. I can hear her sniffling. As I reach her, I slowly sit next to her putting my arm round her and pulling her into me.
She doesn't even look to see who it is and wraps her arm around me and leans on my chest.

After what seems like forever she finally takes a deep breath.
"I give up Niragi" she squeezes me tighter and I can feel her heart beating against my body.

"How did you know it was me?" I whisper back to her "what do you give up?" I squeeze her back hard, rubbing her head.

"I imagined Chishiya couldn't of defended himself against your gun" She looks towards the gun I left beside her. "Did you kill him?" She looks up at me with tears in her eyes. I wished I did kill him, but looking into her eyes I'm glad I didn't.

"No" I whisper back. "I couldn't do it" I  held her a bit more tighter. "As much as I hate him, I couldn't do that to you" I sighed and let go of her, but she pulled me back.

"I guess you have a bit of humanity left after all" she let out a breath of relief.
We just sat in the same position for what seemed like forever. I had to ask the question that I think I already knew the answer to.

"Do you love him?" I stood up looking towards the sky. But she just laughed under her breath.

"What is love?" She took in a deep breath. "I don't even know what life is anymore, I don't know if I'm going to die tomorrow, or next week. Everything here is just so messed up. Everything keeps happening so quickly, it's like time works differently. I don't know how I feel about anyone or anything. Maybe I do love him. Maybe in some weird way I love you. I don't know what I feel"

I could see her shaking as she was trying to hold back tears. I took a step back for a moment. It's like time does work differently here. Why did I become so obsessed and engrossed with her all of a sudden. Its like I was searching for something I've never truly had. All I know is my feelings were real, and if there was a slight part of her that loves me back, then I will keep fighting for her. It kills me knowing Chishiya is the one who stands between us.

"You love me..?" I frown at her. Knowing when she's said it before was only because she thought it was the right thing to say. This time she said it because she might actually mean it.

"I think... there could be a chance" she looked towards the ground, seemingly questioning herself.

If it wasn't for Chishiya, she wouldnt be questioning herself. I should of killed him. I can feel a rage burn up inside me again. I begin furiously shaking at the thought of him being close with y/n.

I picked up my gun and started walking away from her in a hurry.

"Where are you going?" Y/n begins to chase after me, grabbing my arm but I just push her away.

"I've changed my mind" I rest the gun on my shoulder. I will kill him.