Save Me; Ryeji FF

Chapter 3.

The Contract Killer clenched the neck of a cold glass bottle and poured out the brown liquid into a small glass. She gulped down the whiskey, feeling the burning sensation run down her dry throat, the heat rushed throughout her body. Ryujin poured out another, and another. She doesn't like the taste; in fact, she hated it, but she wanted to escape, if she could run from the life she's living-- she'd see the bottom of every bottle of alcohol in the world.

The dark-haired girl took the half empty bottle with her to the balcony and took a seat. She lit up a cigarette, watching the embers glow at the end of the stick. As she took another sip from the glass, she tried to make sense of the disorganised chaos in her mind.

During her youth, she had been no stranger to partaking in acts of deception, destruction, violence and aggression and theft. Feeling guilt was something she didn't recognise she hadn't developed until her teenage life-- as a child, she regularly brought harm upon helpless animals and other children her age that rubbed her the wrong way. This would result in her to bully her peers relentlessly, whether it be physically abusing them or manipulating them into performing deviant acts in her favour.

Seeing her victims in pain, or in distress never fazed the young girl. Instead, it made her more callous towards other people. Towards her teenage years, these acts quickly progressed into more damning actions; self-destruction.

Not understanding herself, she fell into a spiral of self-hatred that filled her life with excessive use of drugs, sleeping with countless people that she just met and drinking alcohol to the point of passing out in a dark alley. It never occurred to Ryujin that her behaviour wasn't typical for a normal teenager.

One night as she left a bar, a man a little older than she was came up behind her and aggressively dragged her into his car. She wasn't surprised but instead excited as she strangulated the man to the point he passed out; the teenager enjoyed the life drain away from the man's eyes. She was interrupted by a group of police officers pulling her away.

If she was capable of an attempted killing in her youth and countless murders in her adulthood, what makes taking the life of the CEO any different? Was it because she is tired of killing people? Was it because killing her goes against all the values she kept for herself? Or was it because when she looked into the target's eyes, she felt the same pain that she has in herself.

Ryujin closed her eyes; her demons are not going to let her rest tonight. The doorknob creaked; the hitman whips her head towards the sound. "Yah, Ryujin. You home?!", the roommate yelled as she closed the door and took off her shoes.

"Out here.", Ryujin looked back out to the night sky in front of her. Chaeryeong walked out to the balcony and took the smoker's cigarette and extinguished it in the ashtray on the table.

"Rude", she rolled her eyes and shifted over to make room for her friend to sit.

"Yknow that I hate it when you smoke.", she plops herself next to Ryujin and faces her.

"Yeah. Hopefully if I continue, you'd move out.", she giggled to herself which ultimately earned her an aching pain on her shoulder. Ryujin stared at Chaeryeong in disbelief who shot her a glare which quickly changed into a smile.

"So, did you do the job?", the redhead asked the hitman. She took a deep sigh before explaining the confronting situation she faced while in the target's home. The way she hesitated which resulted in the cat eyed woman's desperation to end her life.

"Wow..."

"Wow indeed...", Ryujin gulped the rest of the whiskey in her glass, setting the empty glass on the table.

"I'm glad you didn't finish the job.", Chaeryeong leant her tired head on her friend's shoulder.

"How so?", the dark-haired woman shifted her glaze onto the other woman, confused by her statement.

"You never wanted to take the job in the first place, you only accepted it for the money and because you are so fucking competitive that losing isn't in your vocabulary. Now that the mission has failed, that's one less burden in your conscience.", Chaeryeong softly speaks. Ryujin stayed quiet, knowing that her best friend knew her better than she knew herself.

Ever since stepping foot out of the mental institution, she had never felt so alone. Everyone that she ever knew avoided her due to news of her diagnosis being revealed to her friends and family; scared that she would cause them harm.

But the only person that stood by her was Chaeryeong, she ignored the huge, glowing neon sign above Ryujin's head flashing 'A fucking psychopath'. She helped Ryujin with increasing her emotional awareness through long, strenuous hours of lectures or little nudges to remind her to care more.

With her assistance, Ryujin was able to score a job at the cafe which Chaeryeong sobbed for hours, overwhelmed with the genuine happiness for her best friend. She stood by her through all her moments, no matter what. When Ryujin became a hitman, she was against the idea until she listened to Ryujin's values and morals. Eventually, she came to terms with it, assisting her in any way she could.

"Ryujin, shouldn't you take this as a sign that you should stop now? Now that I have a good job, I can care for the bot--"

"No."

"But Ryu-"

"I said no.", She reached for the almost empty bottle, but Chaeryeong stopped her.

"Stop drinking, you need to stop running from your problems."

Ryujin hastily stood up and grabbed the bottle, throwing it against the wall behind Chaeryeong, she flinched at the drunk's action. "How can I?! I've been doing this for God knows how long. I'm good at what I do but now, I don't fucking know what is happening to me.", she yelled.

"Maybe it's because your brain is confused with what your heart is telling you Ryujin, perhaps deep down you know that you shouldn't be taking any more jobs.", she stood up to hug Ryujin, comforting her best friend. The other girl did the same.

As their eyes became weary, the two headed back into the apartment. They wished each other a good night before going back into their rooms. Ryujin washed up before going to bed, knowing that it was going to be another restless night with her overheated brain. She tossed and turned in her mattress, the voices became louder like a constant beeping of a dying fire alarm. No matter how much she tried to fall asleep, the noise was still there.