𓍯 𝐬𝐤𝐳 𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬

ꗃ ⋆ ࣪ . mama just killed a man » angst

warning; jeongin has a mental breakdown, you comfort him, he's so fucking sad i cried writing this

wonder if you care - flyingfish
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VOLUME: ▁▂▃▄▅▆▇ 100%

⊹ ⋆ﾟ꒰ఎ ♡ ໒꒱ ⋆ﾟ⊹

"hi there, hyunjin?" you greeted him through your phone that was pressed between your shoulder in ear, having been interrupted doing the dishes. he never called you during work hours, so you were suprised to say the least. "what's up? do you need something?"

"haha, okay so don't freak out-"

"what?" you cut him off. "did something happen?"

"no, everyone is fine! it's just jeongin isn't doing too great."

you slowly set down the pan and sponge. "what's going on?"

hyunjin goes silent, but speaks up before you could. "i think you need to just see for yourself," he whispers like it's only for you to hear.

"i'm on my way. do i need to bring anything?"

"just yourself. that's all he needs."

‎ ʚ♡⃛ɞ

without any hesitation, you go a tad over the speed limit and eventually find yourself at the studio building. slinging your purse over your comfy clothes, you speed walk inside where felix is waiting for you at the entrance.

"you rarely ever call me here," you say quickly, eager to see your boyfriend.

"i know, but we don't know what else to do," he explains as leads you to their usual practice room.

after a short walk, you're met with the door to the room and pray to whatever god is out there that this goes okay. felix opens the door for you and you thank him. suddenly, all of the guys surrounding jeongin look up at you, making you feel awkward.

"look, [name] is here," seungmin tries reassuring jeongin whom you cannot see.

"we're going to leave. text me if you'd need anything," felix whispers to you as everyone files out the door, and you nod.

there your lover is; sitting on the ground, curled up with his face pressed into his knees. you immediately walk to him and calmly set your bag down before sitting next to him against the wall.

he had gotten upset at the studio before, but never have you had to be called to come comfort him. you weren't sure what you'd be doing now, but all you knew is that you only wanted to protect him from whatever was wrong.

"hey baby," you call to him sweetly, and he only hums back. "do you feel like talking?"

jeongin is hesitant, but eventually shakes his head. he finally turns his head just enough to see you through the hair in his eyes. there, you gave him a gentle smile and held you arms out to him. "c'mere, bubba."

he couldn't help it and gingerly fell into your lap, head laying on one of your thighs. you start to run a hand through his hair, the other rubbing soothing circles into his side.

your heart broke a little more when you heard him sniffling. his breathing was uneven, sometimes being held in for seconds at a time before coming out in choppy gasps. you just wanted to tell him to let it all out, but you knew he needed to do that on his own.

those gods you mentioned earlier must've heard you somehow, because jeongin started to stutter out words. "i just feel so d-disgusting."

oh god, did you know what that felt like. "i'm listening, baby."

"i don't get why i can't love myself as i am," he mutters, managing sentences through brief breaths. his voice kept cracking, but he didn't care at this point. "i wish everything just went as planned and i-i don't even know why i'm here."

his words slowly forming into sobs made you feel almost physically sick for him. you continued to brush his hair with your fingers delicately, as though he'll break if you're even a little bit too hard with them. "i wish you could see yourself the way i see you, my love." this makes him sob harder into your lap. planting a kiss on the side of his head, you continue. "do you hear how everyone talks about you? you complete the group, and you add so much character. there's no stray kids without you. you also add so much to my life. god, i feel like i'm walking on air when you touch me in any way. i don't think i've ever loved someone like i love you."

jeongin can't stop crying. at this point, the tears are completely soaking his face and probably your sweatpants. he wished he could say so many things, but sadly the catches in his breath won't allow him, and so you carry on with your spews of love.

"you'll be okay. i can't take away all of your worries and fears about yourself and your capabilities, but i'll tell you how amazing and important you are and how much i need you everyday. even after you tell me you believe me, i won't stop." you lean into his body to wrap both arms around him somehow, kissing his cheek and shaking shoulder. "i'll never leave you, that's apart of my plan. if nothing goes as planned, i'll always be here to help you get back up, my love."

your words made both his heart and tear ducts explode. he couldn't believe he found someone as wonderful and understanding as you. a person who was willing to hold him while he cried, when he bawled like a baby in their arms. he loved how you just held him after your declaration of love, no more words being spoken.

those arms of yours remained wrapped protectively around him for what felt like hours. it took him time to get past why he was sad in the first place, then everything you had said. if you gave him that speech everyday, he'd start tearing up every single time. he truly had faith in you and your words. it was a miracle in his mind and everyone else's. no one had managed to touch him the way you did.

after some more just laying there, jeongin speaks up. "i love you. so, so much," he says through labored sniffles.

"you have no idea just how much i love you." you gently place a lingering kiss onto his cheek. there's more silence as you rest your chin on his shoulder. then, you whisper, "i think we should go to starbucks.

"but i still have practice-"

"no worries," you reassure him as he turns over to look up at you. "i know chris will let you skip the rest of this."

he slowly nods his head, looking into your calming eyes that seemed to inhale all of his worries before blowing them away. a small smile creeped onto his face at the sight of your face.

jeongin had so many worries. more than the average person, in fact. but when you have an awesome girlfriend, things feel a bit easier.

⊹ ⋆ﾟ꒰ఎ ♡ ໒꒱ ⋆ﾟ⊹

a/n: WAHHH SOMETIMES WISH ID NEVER BEEN BORN AT ALLLLLLLLL i wish being comforted was as easy for me

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