𓍯 𝐬𝐤𝐳 𝐨𝐧𝐞𝐬𝐡𝐨𝐭𝐬

ꗃ ⋆ ࣪ . a crack in the glass » angst

warning: high school!au, chronic illness struggles, panic attacks, crying, mom is pretty cool

feel the light - jennifer lopez
2:20 ─────❍───── 2:30
↻ ⊲ Ⅱ ⊳ ↺
VOLUME: ▁▂▃▄▅▆▇ 100%

⊹ ⋆ﾟ꒰ఎ ♡ ໒꒱ ⋆ﾟ⊹

you feel like everything you said wouldn't happen was happening.

for the past two days, you've been horribly sick. your chronic illness is causing a flair up, and you're in pain.

though, it seems like no one cares. at school, not a single one of your 'friends' have texted you. none of them. they've completely abandoned you.

it pisses you off. the times when they've had a simple cold or even just missed due to a doctor's appointment, you've always reached out to them and made sure they were okay. you even once made a care package for a friend of yours after they missed more than a week of school.

you get it, but also dont. your mother never fails to remind you of how self absorbed teenagers are whenever you start questioning. but if that's the case, then why were you so considerate compared to them?

"i'll be right back," your mom tells you, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "just heading out to the store really quick. love you."

and with that, she's gone. your only solid source of comfort, out buying groceries.

it may be the idea of being alone if something happens, but you're suddenly super anxious. she lets you squeeze her hand when you begin to have a panic attack, or when things suddenly get bad. what if something occurs while she's not here?

you feel it. the pain is starting up again. with pain comes panic.

every single thought that's passed through your mind today clusters into one big pile of anxiety. you begin shaking your hands, lightly hitting the pillows surrounding you, something that happens when you start panicking.

why did nobody care? why wasn't anyone concerned but your family? you've done so much for them, been their shoulder to cry on. what the hell had you done wrong?

you hit yourself instead of the pillows. not with the intention of harming yourself, just because you're so overwhelmed. everything is so fucking intense.

where is someone to calm you down?

you're about to reach for your phone right as there's a knock at the door. you know you can't stand, so you don't even try. they'll go away.

when you pick up your phone, there's a few messages from your best friend.

spiritual backbone 🤠 >
———————-

today 5:32 PM

spiritual backbone
are you home?

spiritual backbone
i brought you a lil something

spiritual backbone
your door is unlocked. can i come in?

you write out a shaking reply of permission, almost immediately hearing the sound of your front door creaking open, before shutting with a thud.

he waits for you to come out a greet him, but when no such thing happens, he starts up the steps. the stairs squeak as he walks up, finding your room. his heart instantly breaks as he awkwardly shuffles to the side of your bed.