I was watching the South Park movie from 1999 last night and I came up with this shit:
Mr. Sandoval: can anybody remember what we read last week?
Sandoval: Yes, Bria?
Bria: Hamlet?
Sandoval: Now let's get an answer from someone who's not a complete idiot
Sandoval: Anyone?
Sandoval: Come on, don't be shy.
Audrey: I think I know the answer, Mr. Sandoval.
Cyrus: MEHMEMEH
Audrey: Shut up, bitchboy!
Cyrus: Don't call me bitchboy, you fucking Jew!
Sandoval: Cyrus!
Sandoval:Did you just say the Fword?
Cyrus:"Jew"?
Audrey: You can't say "fuck" in school, you fucking fat ass.
Sandoval: Audrey!
Cyrus: Why the fuck not?
Sandoval:Cyrus!
Aiden: You said "fuck" again.
Sandoval: Aiden!
Edric: fuck!
Sandoval: Edric!
Cyrus: What's the big deal?
Cyrus: It doesn't hurt anybody.
Cyrus: fuck, fuckity, fuck, fuck, fuck!
Sandoval: How would you like to go see the school counselor?
Cyrus: How would you like to suck my balls?
Sandoval:What did you say?!
Cyrus: I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Cyrus: Actually, what I said was...
Cyrus, pulling out a megaphone:..."How would you like to suck my balls, Mr. Sandoval?"
Jerbo:Holy shit, dude.
Mr. Hermonculus: Well, I must say I'm very disappointed in you kids, m'kay? You should be ashamed of yourselves! Now I've already called in your mothers, but--
Audrey: [frightened] You called my mom?
Mr. Hermonculus: That's right.
Audrey: [even more frightened] Oh no, dude!
Cyrus: Mr. Hermonculus, can I ask a question?
Mr. Hermonculus: M'kay, what?
Cyrus: What's the big fuckin' deal, bitch?
Aiden: Yeah.
Mr. Hermonculus: Oh! N-now I wanna know where you heard these horrific obscenities, m'kay?
Aiden: Nowhere.
Audrey: Uh, we heard them from Mr. Sandoval a few times before.
Aiden: Yeah!
Mr. Hermonculus: Boys, I seriously doubt that Mr. Sandoval ever said...uh, "Eat penguin shit, you ass-spelunker."
CHILDREN: [laughing]
Cyrus: Hee hee hee, sweet!
Aiden: [as mothers walk in] Uh-oh!
Mr. Hermonculus: [to mothers] Thank you all for coming on such short notice.
Katerina : This just isn't like you, Aiden.
Willemina: What did my son say Mr. Hermonculus? Did he say the S-word?
Mr. Hermonculus: No, it was worse than that.
Willemina: The F-word?
Mr. Hermonculus: Well here's a short list of the things they've been saying, m'kay?
Katerina : Oh dear God!
Willemina: What the heck is r34?!
Night: if it exists, there's porn of it
Willemina: Young lady, you will tell Mr. Hermonculus this instant where you heard all these horrible phrases.
Audrey: I...I...
Aiden: We can't tell you. We all took a sacred oath, and swore ourselves to secrecy.
Cyrus: It was deep web
Aiden: Dude!
Cyrus: What? Fuck you guys! I wanna get out of here.
Willemina: THE DEEP WEB?!
Mr. Hermonculus: Excuse me, what the heck is "The deep web"
Willemina: it's where the bad things happen on the Internet
Mr. Hermonculus: Well, I guess I'll have to send a warning letter out to parents before more children go on the deep web
Cyrus: Everybody's fuckin' done it
Night: Cyrus!
Cyrus: I'm sorry, I can't help myself. My actions have warped my fragile little mind
YOU ARE READING
Galaxy Fam
RandomA small book featuring the lives of a silly blond boy, a 17-year-old sweetheart, a six year old chaos child and their toddler aged sister and their parents
